Nicholas Angel: What's the situation?
DS Andy Wainwright: Two blokes and a fuck load of cutlery!

Buttercup: You mock my pain.
Westley: Life is pain, Highness. Anyone who says differently is selling something.

All right, you're going the right way for a smack bottom.

Shrek

Chazz: Are you an official here? 'Cause you've officially given me a boner.
[Whispers]
Chazz: I'm a sex addict. It's my cross to bare.

Kate Veatch: Are you reading the dictionary?
White Goodman: Oh, you caught me. I like to break a mental sweat too.

Are you seeing planes? Is your name Tattoo? Because I swear to God, you're living on Fantasy Island.

Doug Butabi

Brad Hamilton: Arnold, do you want to work at All-American Burger?
Arnold: Yeah, well, um...
Brad Hamilton: I can probably get you in there. Just let me talk to Dennis Taylor.

Back the fuck up Antonio! My dick!

Barry Badrinath

Jake: Car's got a lot of pickup.
Elwood: It's got a cop motor, a 440 cubic inch plant, it's got cop tires, cop suspensions, cop shocks. It's a model made before catalytic converters so it'll run good on regular gas. What do you say, is it the new Bluesmobile or what?
Jake: Fix the cigarette lighter.

Come on out. Oh, the weather outside is weather...

Surfing Instructor

Counting cards isn't illegal. It's frowned upon, like masturbating on an airplane... Maybe since 9/11 when everyone got so damn sensitive. Thanks a lot Bin Laden!

Alan Garner

Don't let the door hit you in the vagina on the way out!

Fantasy baseball player

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