Someone's ear is in danger of getting hair brushed behind it...


Francisco! That's fun to say! Francisco... Frannncisco... Franciscooo...


I'm sexy! I'm a scholar! People like me!

Thurgood Jenkins

Rick Vaughn: What's that shit on your chest?
Eddie Harris: Crisco? Bardol? Vagisil. Any one of them will give you another two to three inches drop on your curve ball. Of course if the umps are watching me real close I'll rub a little jalapeño up my nose, get it running, and if I need to load the ball up I just... wipe my nose.

Zoey: Could you please take your hands off my breasts?
General Aladeen: Those are breasts? I thought you were a boy.

Ricky Bobby: From now on, it's Magic Man and El Diablo.
Cal Naughton, Jr.: What does El Diablo mean?
Ricky Bobby: It's like Spanish for like a fighting chicken.

cheerleader: You better bring it.
Priscilla: Oh, it's already been brought-en.

Michelle: What's my name? Say my name, bitch!
Jim: Michelle! Michelle.

Food is fuel. You get picky about what you put in the tank, your engine is gonna die. Now shut up and eat your garbage.


Just remember, you shake it more than twice you're playing with it.

Bathroom Attendant

Jack Sparrow: Mr. Gibbs.
Gibbs: Captain.
Jack Sparrow: We have a need to travel upriver.
Gibbs: By "need," do you mean a trifling need? Fleeting? As in, say, a fancy?
Jack Sparrow: No, a resolute and unyielding need.

Walter Sobchak: Am I wrong?
The Dude: No you're not wrong.
Walter Sobchak: Am I wrong?
The Dude: You're not wrong Walter. You're just an asshole.
Walter Sobchak: All right then.

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