Popular Comedy Quotes
The Dude: These are, uh...
Brandt: Oh, those are Mr Lebowski's children, so to speak.
The Dude: Different mothers, huh?
The Dude: Racially he's pretty cool?
Brandt: [laughs] They're not literally his children. They're the Little Lebowski Urban Achievers - inner city children of promise but without the necessary means for a - necessary means for a higher education. So Mr Lebowski is committed to sending all of them to college.
This crowd has gone deadly silent, a Cinderella story outta nowhere. Former greenskeeper and now about to become the masters champion.Carl Spackler
Remy: This is me. I think it's apparent that I need to rethink my life a little bit. I can't help myself. I... I like good food, ok? And... good food is... hard for a rat to find!
Django: It wouldn't be so hard to find, if you weren't so picky!
Remy: I don't wanna eat garbage dad!
Tickets? Since when did they start charging for the bus? Didn't we used to ride that shit to school every morning for free?Jay
Judge Smails: Ty, what did you shoot today?
Ty Webb: Oh, Judge, I don't keep score.
Judge Smails: Then how do you measure yourself with other golfers?
Ty Webb: By height.
Tiny: Wayne. How you doin'?
Wayne Campbell: Hey, Tiny, who's playing today?
Tiny: Jolly Green Giants and the Shitty Beetles.
Wayne Campbell: Shitty Beetles? Are they any good?
Tiny: They suck.
Wayne Campbell: Then it's not just a clever name.
Ramona V. Flowers: We all have baggage.
Scott Pilgrim: Yeah well, my baggage doesn't try and kill me every five minutes.
We're so damned lost. Where the hell is Innsbruck, Austria?John Winger
Susan Cooper: My real name is... Amber Valentine.
Rayna Boyanov: What are you, a porn star?
What do tigers dream of when they take a little tiger snooze? Do they dream of mauling zebras or Halle Berry in her cat woman suit.Stu Price
What kind of rat bastard psychotic would play that song right now, at this moment?Raoul Duke
What the? Oh Richard you're a riot. Stop the car. Son of a. What the hell's gotten into you? My thing got stuck in my zipper and I got piss all over my pants!Tommy