Sydney: Society tells us we're civilized but the truth is we are animals. Sometimes we just have to let it out. Try it.
Sydney: Good. Now gently remove your tampon and try again.
Peter: Do you need a plastic bag, or....
Sydney: Oh no. I don't clean up after my dog.
Hey, Sydney! I could be in Venice by five. I could do that.Peter
Sydney: Hey check out these, too. That guy needs to fart.
Peter: That guy seems to be clenching.
Peter's mom: Peter always connected better with women.
Zooey: You know, I can see that because he is a great boyfriend.
Peter: Thank you fiancee.
Peter's dad: Also, you got to understand, Zooey, Peter matured sexually at a very early age. I remember taking him swimming when he was twelve-years-old, kid had a bush like a forty-year-old Serbian.
Peter: Oh come on!
I'm not here to service you, I'm here to service these young boys.Gayle Sweeny
I'm in a rut, we're in a rut. Let's shape things up. I have an idea, let's get married! I don't have a ring...Danny
It's not that I don't like you, I just don't like to eat with other people.Danny
Danny: Man, why do you bow for that guy?
Augie Farks: Because he's the king, and he rules the entire realm.
Danny: Oh he rules the entire realm? Oh my bad.
Danny: Is that when he is or isn't whacking it to The Sims?
Why don't you lay out two lines of your selfishness, which is your blow, draw the shades, take the phone off the hook, grab a straw, and snort!Gayle Sweeny
[to Joe] God don't like you... He grew you in a petri dish!Madea
I'm Madea! Ma to the damn D-E-A!Madea