Becca: Your cock is so smooth!
Evan: Your's would be too... if you were a man.

Seth: Its like a three thing... its like ball, dick, ball.
Evan: It's like a division sign... I just wish you would take those off.

Evan: Yeah chicks go nuts for that... the male camel toe.
Seth: Yea yea! The camel tail.

The car committed suicide.


[in his therapist's fantasy] I've come five hundred miles to deliver my seed.

Brennan Huff

You better not close your eyes because as soon as you do I'm gonna punch you in the face!

Brennan Huff

Dale Doback: Can we turn our beds into bunkbeds?
Brennan Huff: It will give us so much extra space in our room to do activities!
Dr. Robert Doback: Your adults, you can do what you want.
Dale Doback: This is the funnest night ever!

You are making an ass out of yourself, you geriatric fuck!

Brennan Huff

I tea-bagged your drum set!

Brennan Huff

Shut your mouth. Sh-sh-shut your mouth.

Brennan Huff

Dr. P: Every once in a while, a shepherd has to pluck a sheep from the heard and challenge him. It lets the man know he's worthy of leading him.
Roger: Well, you know what? I don't want to be a shepherd anymore!
Dr. P: You're not the shepherd, DUMB ASS, I'm the shepherd! Its called an analogy, moron!
Roger: Look, you dont understand. Everything was going so well between us.
Dr. P: Well, clearly I'm sure you're just days away from adopting a Chinese kid together.

Eli: [when he grabs his paintball gun] It says here that the shooter must maintain a 100-yard distance from target.
Dr. P: [shoots Eli in the chest] Anyone else wanna read their gun?

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