I want you all over that ball like a fat kid on a cupcake!Van Wilder
Well, you haven't lived until you've shot-putted blitzed on Jager!"Van Wilder
Gwen: Well I think it takes a lot more then the kind of underwear one wears to define them as a person.
[Van looks shocked]
Van Wilder: Like what?
Richard: Mr. Wilder here is quite the collegian. He's in his, what? sixth year?
Van Wilder: Actually, its lucky number seven.
Gwen: I'm doing a human interest piece... on you.
Van Wilder: I'm flattered, I'd love for your piece to be on me.
[looks up at the ceiling and sighs]
Van Wilder: ... But sadly I don't do interviews, never have, never will. Do lunch though.
Van Wilder: Well just take a look at this... ya... doodles... I attend class today just about stayed the whole time too!
Gwen: I'm glad you went to all your classes today.
Van Wilder: And a few that weren't mine, I stepped in the wrong room, liked what I heard... stayed.
Gwen: That's great!
Wow, If he's here, who's running hell?Van Wilder
Van Wilder: Blue - it brings out your eyes. The kid has killer eyes, not unlike yourself - anyone ever tell you that?
Gwen: Yes, my boyfriend.
Van Wilder: Your boyfriend? What's his name?
Gwen: I don't think that's any of your business.
Van Wilder: [Puts on sunglasses and turns away] You're right
if you're always thinking about the future, then you kinda forget about the present.Van Wilder
You shouldn't take life to seriously. You'll never get out alive.Van Wilder
Van Wilder: Whoa, trick or treat. What's going on?
Richard: This vaginal discharge won't let us partake in the party.
Van Wilder: Graphic.
Her name's Naomi. That's "I moan" backwards.Van Wilder