I'm on Shag Highway heading West.


Tell her that you love her. You've got nothing to lose, and you'll always regret it if you don't.


But you know the thing about romance is people only get together right at the very end.


John: I might get a shag at last.
Judy: Naughty.

Harry: Right, the Christmas party. Not my favourite night of the year and your unhappy job to organise.
Mia: So tell me.
Harry: Pretty basic really. Find a venue, overorder on the drinks, bulk buy the guacamole and advise the girls to avoid Kevin if they want their breasts unfondled.

I just want a glimpse of me in a wedding dress that isn't bright turquoise.


I look quite pretty.


The President: We love that old thing.
Harry: What is this we're listening to?
Karen: Joni Mitchell.
Harry: I can't believe you still listen to Joni Mitchell.
Karen: I love her. And true love lasts a lifetime. Joni Mitchell is the woman who taught your cold English wife how to feel.
Harry: Did she? Oh well that's good. I must write to her some time and say thanks.

Prime Minister: I'm very jealous of your plane, by the way.
The President: We love that old thing.

Hurry up big boy, I'm naked and I want you at least twice before Jamie gets home.

Jamie's Girlfriend

Tony: You'll come back a broken man.
Colin: Yeah, back broken from too much sex.

Thank you. That will be nice. Yes is being my answer. Easy question.


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