Fairchild Van Waldenberg: Mommy and Daddy would've wanted you to do it!
Stranz Van Waldenberg: Yeah, remember how they used to be alive?

Jimmy: Get out of my face!
Chazz: I'll get inside your face!

Chazz: Are you an official here? 'Cause you've officially given me a boner.
[Whispers]
Chazz: I'm a sex addict. It's my cross to bare.

Chazz: Personal philosophy: Clothing optional.

Coach: What do you guys have that all other teams don't have?
Chazz: Twin dongs?

How'd it go with your lady? Carve up any ice... With your weiner?

Chazz

I wanna wear the gold medal... naked.

Hector

He likes food, and dreams, and whispers... his favorite movie is Short Circuit... and Fried Green tomatoes.

Hector

Chazz: Night is a very dark time for me.
Jimmy: It's dark for everyone, idiot!
Chazz: Not for people who live in Alaska. Or people with night-vision goggles.

I swear to god if you cut my head off...

Chazz

You better not cut my head off!

Chazz

I just wanna cut off your skin and wear it to my birthday.

Hector

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