Police Chief Grady: I will have the enchilada platter with two tacos and no guacamoles. Mike?
Local Officer Rando: Yeah, chief. I'll have a CHINCHILLA!
Rabbit: I don't get it. Tacos?
Thorny: They think I'm Mexican.
Rabbit: You're not?

You boys like Mex-i-co? Woo-hoo!!


Thorny: Where are your shoes?
Foster: What are you, the shoe police now?
Thorny: I am, and you owe me 20 laps around the bar.
Foster: Black magic only works on the rookie.
Thorny: That's brown magic.

Captain O'Hagan: I swear to God I'm going to pistol whip the next guy who says, "Shenanigans."
Mac: Hey Farva what's the name of that restaurant you like with all the goofy shit on the walls and the mozzarella sticks?
Farva: You mean Shenanigans?

[In an Irish accent] I'll believe ya when me shit turns purple and smells like rainbow sherbet.

Captain O'Hagan

Police Chief Grady: I'm sorry about that delousing. Just standard procedure.
Farva: It's powdered sugar.
Police Chief Grady: The lice hate the sugar.
Farva: [deadpanning] It's delicious.

Desperation is a stinky cologne.

Police Chief Grady

Foster: Okie silly dilly dokie-o. I'm an idiot.
Mac: That's true.

Farva: Hey, let's pop some Viagras and issue tickets with raging, mega-huge boners.
Thorny: You know, Farva, only you can make a dark man blush. And no, we're not doing it.

Thorny: Who wants a moustache ride?
German Woman: I do, I do!
German Man: Oooh, I vant von too!

Officer Smy: [to Ursula] If you were my wife, I'd take you down a peg or two.
[to Foster]
Officer Smy: Hey douche bag.
Foster: [to Ursula] If you were my wife, I'd massage your feet 'til you fell asleep.
Ursula: Nice try.

Just cleaning out the old locker, she stinks like ass but I'll sure miss her... I guess you could say that about all my girls.


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