Whitney: Oh, don't play dumb. We're better at it then you.
Courtney: You were having cheer-sex with him!

Our next defeat is scheduled for next Friday, 8 o'clock.

Football Announcer

Hey, ladies, wanna see my spirit stick?

Jan

You are all great athletes, thanks in large part... to me.

Big Red

Big Red ran the show, man. We were just flying ignorami, for sobbing out loud.

Darcy

Jan: You know, all the cheerleaders in the world wouldn't help our football team.
Les: It's just wrong. Cheering for them is just plain mean!

Missy: What is your sexuality?
Les: Well, Jan's straight, and I'm... controversial.
Missy: Are you trying to tell me you speak fag?
Les: Oh, fluently.

Isis: Hey! Enjoy the show?
Lava: Yes, were the ethnic festivities to your liking today?

Isis: You wanna make it right? Then when you go to Nationals... bring it. Don't slack off because you feel sorry for us. That way, when we beat you, we'll know it's because we're better.
Torrance Shipman: Oh, I'll bring it. Don't worry.
Isis: I never do.

Torrance Shipman: You know, mothers have killed to get their daughters on squads.
Christine Shipman: That mother didn't kill anybody. She hired a hit man.

Torrance Shipman: Ever been to a cheerleading competition?
Missy: Oh, you mean like a football game?
Torrance Shipman: No, not a game, those are like practices for us. I'm talking about a tournament. ESPN cameras all around. Hundreds of people cheering.
Cliff: Wait a minute, people cheering... cheerleaders?
Torrance Shipman: That's right. Lots of people. Here's the deal, Missy. We're the shit, the best. We work hard, have fun, and win national championships. I'm offering you a chance to be a part of that.

Missy: See, I'm a hardcore gymnast. No way jumping up and down yelling "Go Team Go!" is gonna satisfy me.
Torrance Shipman: We're gymnasts too... except no beams, no bars, no vault.

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