These are great days we're living, bros. We are jolly green giants, walking the Earth with guns. These people we wasted here today are the finest human beings we will ever know. After we rotate back to the world, we're gonna miss not having anyone around that's worth shooting.

Crazy Earl

Larry: What does your cunt taste like?
Alice: Heaven.

I'm your brother... from another mother.

Henry Brands

I can see the Statue of Liberty already!... Very small, of course.


Go web! Fly! Up, up, and away web! Shazaam! Go! Go! Go web go! Tally ho.


Michael Llewelyn Davies: Excuse me, sir, you're standing on my sleeve.
J.M. Barrie: [moves his foot and looks down to face Michael] Am I? So sorry. I might point out you're lying under my bench.

Yeah... yum yum... yeah... nice girl... nice girl, very charming girl... I talked with her... yeah But you, you just let her walk out rigth out with the 3 stooges. And you know why? 'cause you're a big fat pussy. Well. I gotta go. Good day pussycake.

Walt Kowalski

Wendell: That's very linear Sherrif.
Ed Tom Bell: Well, age will flatten a man.

Coach Paul 'Doc' Hines: You have twelve brothers and sisters?
Coach Boone: Eight.
Coach Paul 'Doc' Hines: Yeah, twelve sounds better.

Frank Lopez: Lesson number one: Don't underestimate the other guy's greed!
Elvira Hancock: Lesson number two: Don't get high on your own supply.

[intercepted radio message] I watched a snail crawl along the edge of a straight razor. That's my dream; that's my nightmare. Crawling, slithering, along the edge of a straight razor... and surviving.


Ed Tom Bell: Now that's aggrevatin'.
Wendell: Sheriff?
Ed Tom Bell: [points to a bottle of milk] Still sweatin'.
Wendell: Whoa, Sheriff! We just missed him! We gotta circulate this!
Ed Tom Bell: Well, okay. What do we circulate? Lookin' for a man who recently drunk milk?

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