[greeting a pair of visitors from Jefferson City] I heard tell once of a Jefferson City lawyer who had a parrot that would wake him each morning crying out 'today's the day the world shall end as scripture has foretold'. And one day, the lawyer shot him for the sake of peace and quiet I presume, thus fulfilling, for the bird at least, his prophecy.

Abraham Lincoln

We cannot be missing from our children's lives. They are ours to protect.

Reverend Shaw Moore

King George VI: [Logue is sitting on the coronation throne] Get up! Y-you can't sit there! GET UP!
Lionel Logue: Why not? It's a chair.
King George VI: T-that... that is Saint Edward's chair.
Lionel Logue: People have carved their names on it.
King George VI: L-listen to me... listen to me!
Lionel Logue: Why should I waste my time listening to you?
King George VI: Because I have a voice!
Lionel Logue: ...yes, you do.

Professor Snape: Have you any theories as to how Black got in?
Dumbledore: Many, each as unlikely as the next.

[to Mercedes] Have you seen my mother? She's very beautiful.

Ofelia

Hagrid: Blimey, I'd love a dragon.
Harry: You'd like a dragon?
Hagrid: Vastly misunderstood beasts, Harry. Vastly misunderstood.

He's so little!

D-Bob

This is a chemical burn. It will hurt more than you've ever been burned before. You will have a scar.

Tyler Durden

Legolas: There is a fell voice on the air.
Gandalf: It's Saruman!
[avalanches start]
Aragorn: He's trying to bring down the mountain! Gandalf, we must turn back!
Gandalf: No!

It makes me wonder if you know the different between a sneeze and a wet fart!

Bud Kilmer

You've got a bloody cheek!

Mia: Don't you just love it when you come back from the bathroom and find your food waiting for you?
Vincent: We're lucky we got anything at all. I don't think Buddy Holly's much of a waiter.

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