Coach Ken Carter: You shooting the ball, what's your name?
Jason Lyle: Jason Lyle, but I ain't no sir.
Coach Ken Carter: Oh, well are you a madam?

Well, let's see if you can get this one. I've got a little story for you. All right. There's an old couple in bed. Mary and Paddy. And they wake up on the morning their... fiftieth anniversary. And Mary looks over and gazes adoringly at Paddy, she's like, "Aw, Jesus, Paddy. You're such a good lookin' feller. I love you. I want to give you a little present. Anything your little heart desires, I'm going to give it to ya'. What would you like?" And Paddy's like, "Aw, gee, Mary, that's a very sweet offer. Now, in fifty years, there's one thing that's been missing. And uh... I would like you to give me a blow job. I would like that." And Mary's like, "All right." She takes her teeth out, puts them in the glass and she gives him a blow job. And afterwards, Paddy's like, "Ah, geez, now THAT's what I've been missin'.
That was the most beautiful, Earth-shatterin' thing ever. Beautiful Mary, I love ya'! Is there anything that I can do for you?" And Mary looks up at him and she goes, "Give us a kiss!"

Skylar

There are many things my father taught me here in this room. He taught me

Michael Corleone

He won!

Mae Braddock
  • Permalink: He won!
  • Rating: 1.0 / 5.0

Sorry I'm late, it's a jungle out there; I had to beat an old lady with a stick to get these cranberries.

Peter Parker

Capt. Bart Mancuso: You, you speak English?
Red October Officer: Yes, sir.
Capt. Bart Mancuso: Get your butt over here!

Kelly: I'm under Evelyn Waugh.
Charlotte: Evelyn Waugh was a man.

That shit is purer than a preacher daughter's pussy, right there.

Ron Woodroof

It's such a grey day.

Angela

Hamish: Some men are longer than others.
Campbell: Your mother's been telling stories about me again, ah?

She got the cancer and died on a Tuesday.

Forrest Gump

Agatha Sparrow: You would never hurt anyone.
Walter Sparrow: [whispering in a dark, eerie, but calm voice] How do you know?

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