Frank Costello: Have a seat, Bill.
[Costigan sits down at Costello's dinner table]
Frank Costello: [while eating crab] Do you know John Lennon?
Billy Costigan: Yeah, sure, he was the president before Lincoln.
Frank Costello: Lennon said, "I'm an artist. You give me a fucking tuba, I'll get you something out of it."
Billy Costigan: [sarcastically] Well I tell you Mr. Costello, I'd like to squeeze some fucking money out of it.
Frank Costello: Smart mouth. Too bad. If you'll indulge me...
[sees Gwen leaving]
Frank Costello: Now what?
Gwen: Choir practice.
Frank Costello: [annoyed] Choir practice.
[Costello pulls out a severed human hand]
Frank Costello: The point I'm making with John Lennon is - a man could look at anything, and make something out of it. For instance, I look at you and I think "what could I use you for?"

Her husband was too drunk to know he was too drunk to drive.

Charles

Ray Kinsella: The Voice is back.
Annie Kinsella: Oh, Lord. You're supposed to build a football field now?

Ray Kinsella: Don't you miss being involved?
Terence Mann: I was the East Coast distributor of "involved." I ate it, drank it, and breathed it... Then they killed Martin, Bobby, and they elected Tricky Dick twice, and people like you must think I'm miserable because I'm not involved anymore. Well, I've got news for you. I spent all my misery years ago. I have no more pain for anything. I gave at the office.

Charles: That Isaac Newton fellow was right.
Nash: He was on to something.
Charles: Clever boy.

Annie Kinsella: [trying to understand the situation] I mean, Shoeless Joe...
Ray Kinsella: He's dead. Died in '51; he's dead.
Annie Kinsella: He's the one they suspended, right?
Ray Kinsella: Right.
Annie Kinsella: He's still dead?
Ray Kinsella: Far as I know.

Ray Kinsella: I think I know what "If you build it, he will come" means.
Annie Kinsella: Ooh... why do I not think this is such a good thing?
Ray Kinsella: I think it means that if I build a baseball field out there that Shoeless Joe Jackson will get to come back and play ball again.
Annie Kinsella: [staring in disbelief] You're kidding.
Ray Kinsella: Huh-uh.
Annie Kinsella: Wow.
Ray Kinsella: Yeah.
Annie Kinsella: Ha. You're kidding.

Hansen: Cowards, all of you. Come on. Whoever wins, Sol does his laundry for the semester.
Sol: Does that seem unfair to anybody?
Bender: No, not at all.

Kirby: I always thought we'd be friends forever.
Kevin: Yeah, well forever got a lot shorter all of a sudden.

Wendy: We're really worried about this affair with your boss.
Jules: I don't know why you're both so worried... So, I bop him for a couple of years, get his job when he gets his hands caught in the vault, do a black mink ad, retire in utter disgrace, then write a best seller and be a fabulous host on my own talk show...

I have respect for beer.

Nash

Mark: Admit it, Ray. You've never liked farming.
Ray Kinsella: That's not true.
Mark: It is true. You don't know the first thing about farming.
Ray Kinsella: Yes I do. I know a lot about farming. I know more than you think I know.
Mark: Then how could you plow under your major crop?
Ray Kinsella: [feigning puzzlement at this word] What's a crop?

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