I can't believe I brought my real parents to our wedding.

John Smith

John Smith: I realise you witnessed the Mrs. and I working through a few domestic issues. That's regrettable but don't take that to be a sign of weakness, that would be a mistake on your part.
[Jane is drumming her fingers impatiently]
John Smith: Honey!
Jane Smith: Wrap it up.
John Smith: Maybe it's not such a good idea to undermine me in front of the hostage - sends a mixed message.
Jane Smith: Sorry.
John Smith: Girls. Where was I?
Benjamin: Mistake on your part.
John Smith: Shut up.

John Smith: Did you hear the helicopter dropping me off that night for our anniversary dinner?
Jane Smith: No. Oh, percussion grenades. I was partially deaf that evening.

John Smith: [talking about their predicament] So what do we do, Jane? Shoot it out here? Hope for the best?
Jane Smith: Well, that would be bad because they would probably ask me to leave once you are dead.

Jane Smith: [dancing with John, he's just finished searching her for weapons] Satisfied?
John Smith: Not for years.

John Smith: That left of yours is a thing of beauty.
Jane Smith: Mmm. You take it well.

John Smith: You live with your mom, Eddie.
Eddie: [offended] Why would you bring her into this, she happens to be a first class lady!

Eddie: You gotta take this bitch out!
John Smith: Don't tell me how to handle my wife.

Ladies, we're gonna have some fun

Stuntman Mike

Pam: Is that cowboy wisdom?
Stuntman Mike: I'm not a cowboy Pam, I'm a stuntman.

Peter Parker: Can I do anything for you?
Aunt May: You do too much - college, a job, all this time with me... You're not Superman, you know.

Peter Parker: You don't trust anyone, that's your problem.
J. Jonah Jameson: I trust my barber.

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