The magic is unsanitary!


George Hanson: What's "dude"? Is that like "dude ranch"?
Captain America: Dude means nice guy. Dude means a regular sort of person.

Ken: [while examining bite wound on Leroy's buttocks] Okay, looks like the venom has to be sucked out.
[Looks around]
Ken: Anyone? Ok, fine. I'll do it.
Big Leroy: [pushes Ken away] Oh, there will be no sucking! Get this guy away from my ass!

Raquel: I mean screwing around is second oldest reason to kill someone.
Emily: Oh really, and what would be the first?
Raquel: Money, honey!

See, she's making me my dinner!

Lenny Savage

Officer: What took you, Stensland?
Dick Stensland: My partner stopped to help a damsel in distress. He's got his priorities all screwed up.

Terry: You know, I seen you a lot of times before. Remember parochial school out on Paluski Street? Seven, eight years ago. Your hair, you had your hair uh...
Edie: Braids.
Terry: Looked like a hunk of rope. And you had wires on your teeth and glasses and everything. You was really a mess.

Great. I'm blind and you're deaf. What a perfect pair.


Prince Nuada: I will kill anyone if that is necessary.
Hellboy: Why don't you just start with me?

Karen Holmes: Are these really important?
Sergeant Milton Warden: Yes, but not important they get signed today. Tomorrow's okay.
[She rips them up]
Sergeant Milton Warden: I have copies at the office, so it won't be much work to fix 'em up.
Karen Holmes: That's what I like about you, Sergeant: you have confidence. It's also what I dislike about you.
Sergeant Milton Warden: It's not confidence, ma'am; it's honesty. I just hate to see a beautiful woman going all to waste.
Karen Holmes: Waste, did you say? There's a subject I might tell you something about. I know several kinds of waste, Sergeant. You're probably not even remotely aware of some of them. Would you like to hear? For instance, what about the house without a child? There's one sort for you. Then there's another... You're doing fine, Sergeant. My husband's off somewhere, and it's raining outside, and we're both drinking now. You've probably only got one thing wrong. The lady herself. The lady's not what she seems. She's a... washout, if you know what I mean... and I'm sure you know what I mean!
Sergeant Milton Warden: You going to cry?
Karen Holmes: Not if I can help it. What are you doing?
Sergeant Milton Warden: I'm leaving. Isn't that what you want?
Karen Holmes: I don't know, Sergeant. I don't know.

Derek Vinyard: You'll be outta here in no time.
Lamont: C'mon man, it's a piece of cake, a'ight? You just take it easy on the brothers, a'ight? The brothers!

Severus Snape: [to Harry] In the past it was often of the Dark Lords pleasure to invade the minds of his victims, creating visions designed to torture them into madness, only extracting the last exquisite ounce of agony, only when he had them beging for death would he finally... kill them. Used properly the power of Occlumency will sheild you from access or influence. In these lessons, I will attempt to penetrate your mind, you will attempt to resist. Perpare yourself!
[Harry sits up. Snape raises wand]
Severus Snape: Legilimens!

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