President Andrew Shepherd: Is the view pretty good from the cheap seats, A.J.?
A.J.: I beg your pardon?
President Andrew Shepherd: Because it occurs to me that in 25 years I've never seen YOUR name on a ballot. Now why is that? Why are you always one step behind ME?
A.J.: Because if I wasn't, you'd be the most popular history teacher at the University of Wisconsin!
President Andrew Shepherd: Fuck you!

Let me tell you something my friend. Hope is a dangerous thing. Hope can drive a man insane.

Red

[narrating] I must admit I didn't think much of Andy first time I laid eyes on him; looked like a stiff breeze would blow him over. That was my first impression of the man.

Red

No, I don't think I will kiss you, although you need kissing, badly. That's what's wrong with you. You should be kissed and often, and by someone who knows how.

Rhett Butler

Now you wouldn't believe me if I told you, but I could run like the wind blows. From that day on, if I was ever going somewhere, I was running!

Forrest Gump

People who talk in metaphors oughta shampoo my crotch.

Melvin Udall

Capt. Ramsey: Speaking of horses did you ever see those Lipizzaner stallions.
Hunter: What?
Capt. Ramsey: From Portugal. The Lipizzaner stallions. The most highly trained horses in the world. They're all white?
Hunter: Yes, sir.
Capt. Ramsey: "Yes, sir" you're aware they're all white or "Yes, sir" you've seen them?
Hunter: Yes, sir I've seen them. Yes, sir I was aware that they're are all white. They are not from Portugal; they're from Spain and at birth, they're not white; they're black. Sir.
Capt. Ramsey: I didn't know that. But they are from Portugal.

Rose: Teach me to ride like a man.
Jack: And chew tobacco like a man.
Rose: And spit like a man!
Jack: What, they didn't teach you that in finishing school?

Carol Connelly: Why can't I have a normal boyfriend? Just a regular boyfriend, one that doesn't go nuts on me!
Beverly Connelly: Everybody wants that, dear. It doesn't exist.

Edward Lewis: You can't charge me for directions!
Vivian: I can do anything I want to baby, I ain't lost.

You think I'm fucking stupid? I know it was you.

Terence Fletcher

Elliot: You're so immature!
Greg: And you're such a sinus supremus.
Elliot: Zero charisma!
Greg: Sinus supremus!
Elliot: Zero charisma!
Greg: Sinus supremus!
Elliot: Shut up Greg!

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