Harry Terwilliger: We thought he was doped.
Paul Edgecomb: You didn't ask?
Harry Terwilliger: [shakes his head]
Paul Edgecomb: Well I don't think that's a mistake you'll be needing to make again anytime soon is it?

Percy Wetmore: Deranged killer? He look more like a limp noodle to me. Hey!
[to a doped Wild Bill]
Percy Wetmore: You've been declared competent, son, 'know what that means? 'Means you gonna ride the lightning. Haha.
Dean Stanton: Percy, shut up and give us a hand.

The Almighty says this must be a fashionable fight. It's drawn the finest people.

Stephen

Honey, if you don't tell me what's on your mind, I'm afraid I'll have to smother you with a pillow.

Jan Edgecomb

Brutus "Brutal" Howell: He's enormous!
Paul Edgecomb: Can't be bigger than you.

What are you looking at, you limp noodle? Ya wanna kiss my ass? Ya wanna suck my dick?

William 'Wild Bill' Wharton

He's chokin'. Whatever he sucked out of her, he's choking on!

Brutus "Brutal" Howell

Paul Edgecomb: I wanna hear about this new inmate, aside from how big he is!
Brutus "Brutal" Howell: Monstrous big!

I thank you. Mr. Jingles thank you, my mom would thank you too but she's dead.

Eduard Delacroix

Seeing a man die isn't enough for you, you gotta be close enough to smell his nuts cook?

Paul Edgecomb

[first lines]
[Hedwig wants to be let out of her cage]
Harry: I can't let you out, Hedwig! I'm not allowed to use magic outside of school. Besides, if Uncle Vernon...
Uncle Vernon: [yells] Harry Potter!
Harry: Now you've done it.

John Smith: That left of yours is a thing of beauty.
Jane Smith: Mmm. You take it well.

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