Rob Hawkins: Hey, is that my camera?
Hud: Uh, I don't know. Jason just gave it to me.
Rob Hawkins: Did you change the tape? Because I had a tape in there... something important.
Hud: I didn't, it was already on when I got it.

Hud: Please tell me she lives on the ground floor.
Rob Hawkins: 39th.
Hud: Shit.

Hud: [during a very stressful run up stairs] How could they not know anything about it? Unless... maybe they're like, in on it, you know? Like maybe the government created it or something.
Rob Hawkins: Do we have to talk about this now Hud?
Hud: Well, I need to talk about something, because if I don't I'm going to actually shit my pants in this stairwell.

Beth McIntyre: Good luck in Japan.
Rob Hawkins: [to Beth's date] Good luck tonight, Travis.

Rob Hawkins: Come on. Admit it, you *are* gonna miss me a little... right?
Beth McIntyre: Oh... Yeah, well...
Rob Hawkins: OK. Yeah. Alright. Alright. Well, what was I sayin'? We got like three seconds left. Whadd'you wanna say? Whadd'you wanna say? Last thing to the cam.
Beth McIntyre: Um... I had a good day.

Hud: Do you guys remember a couple of years ago when that guy was lighting homeless people on fire in the subways?
Rob Hawkins: Jesus, Hud! Maybe not the best time for this conversation down here!
Hud: Right.
[awkward silent pause]
Hud: I just can't stop thinking how scary it'd be if a flaming homeless guy came running...
Rob Hawkins, Lily Ford, Marlena Diamond: HUD!
Hud: I'm just saying. Sorry.

Lily Ford: Rob and Beth slept together.
Hud: Are you serious?
Lily Ford: Yeah, a few weeks ago. Beth made me promise not to say anything.
Jason Hawkins: Are you kidding me Lily? Rob and Beth sleeping together and you're not even going to tell me that?
Hud: Why wouldn't you tell me?
Lily Ford: [long pause] Why wouldn't I tell you?

I'm not afraid to go out!

Alex Rover

[Offering Mrs. Robinson a coat hanger]
Benjamin: Wood?
Mrs. Robinson: What?
Benjamin: Wood or wire? They have both.

Room Clerk: Are you here for an affair, sir?
Benjamin: What?
Room Clerk: The Singleman party, sir?
Benjamin: Ah, yes, the Singleman party.

Mrs. Robinson: Benjamin.
Benjamin: Yes?
Mrs. Robinson: Isn't there something you want to tell me?
Benjamin: Tell you?
Mrs. Robinson: Yes.
Benjamin: Well, I want you to know how much I appreciate this. Really.
Mrs. Robinson: The number.
Benjamin: What?
Mrs. Robinson: The room number, Benjamin. I think you ought to tell me that.
Benjamin: Oh, you're absolutely right. It's 568.
Mrs. Robinson: Thank you.
Benjamin: You're welcome. Well... I'll see you later, Mrs. Robinson.

Benjamin: Where did you do it?
Mrs. Robinson: In his car.
Benjamin: What kind of car was it?
Mrs. Robinson: Come on now.
Benjamin: No, I really want to know.
Mrs. Robinson: A Ford.
Benjamin: Goddamn, that's great. So old Elaine Robinson got started in a Ford.

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