Kirby: There are several quintessential moments in a man's life: losing his virginity, getting married, becoming a father, and having the right girl smile at you.

Vincent Benedict: [impressed with Julius's fighting abilities] You could be a boxer or something. I could be your manager.
Julius Benedict: No, I could never fight for money.
Vincent Benedict: Well that's fine. You fight, I'll keep the money.

Josephine: I'd like to take your picture.
Senior Ed Bloom: Oh, you don't need a picture. Just look up "handsome" in the dictionary.

Fucking dog. Fucking coach. Fucking Americans.


Christopher Gardner: Don't ever let someone tell you, you can't do something. Not even me.
Christopher: [silent]
Christopher Gardner: All right? You got a dream… You gotta protect it. People can’t do somethin’ themselves, they wanna tell you you can’t do it. If you want somethin’, go get it. Period.
Christopher: All right.

Jeffrey Pelt: I can't ask any of these characters to go. One, they don't believe in it. Two, they'd never stake their reputation on a hunch. Whereas you...
Jack Ryan: ...are expendable.
Jeffrey Pelt: Something like that.

Dick Cheney: [talking about torture methods] They utilize fear scenarios.
George W. Bush: You mean like pulling out their toenails?

Now you listen to me, you smooth talking son-of-a-bitch. Let me lay it on the line for you and your boss, whoever he is. Johnny Fontane will never get that movie. I don't care how many dago guinea wop greaseball goombahs come out of the woodwork.

Jack Woltz

Quint: Hey, Hoop, you wanna feel somethin' permanent? You just put your hand underneath my cap... and you just feel that little lump. Knock an ole un, St. Paddy's day, Boston.
Hooper: I got that beat.

Dad, you wanna hear something funny? There was a man who was drowning, and a boat came, and the man on the boat said "Do you need help?" and the man said "God will save me". Then another boat came and he tried to help him, but he said "God will save me", then he drowned and went to Heaven. Then the man told God, "God, why didn't you save me?" and God said "I sent you two boats, you dummy!"


Farmer #1: [sees Jack] Say... that the piss ant that used to ride the bulls?
Farmer #2: Used to try.

I think every guy should at one time try to name an animal or something.

Rocky Balboa

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