Westray: Well, I'm perfectly willing to believe you had nothing to do with this but I'm not the party you have to convince.
Counselor: Convince of what, for Christ sake?
Westray: That this is some sort of coincidence. Because they don't really believe in coincidences. They've heard of them. They've just never seen one.

Lou: [Lou hits Tyler in face] Do you hear me now?
Tyler Durden: No I didn't quite catch that Lou.
[Lou hits him again]
Tyler Durden: Still not getting it.
[Lou hits him a few more times]
Tyler Durden: Okay, I got it. Shit I lost it.
[Lou continues to pummel Tyler]

Capt. Ramsey: How do you like that cigar?
Hunter: It's good, sir.
Capt. Ramsey: It's your first?
Hunter: [coughing] Yeah.
Capt. Ramsey: Well, don't like it too much. They're more expensive than drugs.

Farhad: Who's the girl?
Nicky: Her name is Jess. She's our intern.
Farhad: You hitting that?
Jess: Hi, I'm right here!
Nicky: No, Farhad, I'm not hitting that.
Farhad: You should hit that.
Nicky: Again, I’m right here!

Mickey: You know what you are?
Rocky: No, what?
Mickey: A tomato.
Rocky: A tomato?
Mickey: Yeah, and I'm running a business here, not a goddamn soup kitchen.

Steve: Did your goblin come back?
Michael: Shut up.
Greg: Well, did he?
Elliot: Yeah, he came back. But he's not a goblin. He's a spaceman.
Tyler: Ooh! An Extra-Terrestrial! Where's he from? Uranus? Get it? Your anus?
Greg: He doesn't get it Ty.
Tyler: Get it? Your anus?
Greg: He doesn't get it.

Learn that shit, brother. That shit'll get you killed. These motherfuckers out there be plotting all types of shit on you.


You still think you're the cutest trick in shoe leather.

Rhett Butler

Bone: You got business here, Rookie?
Jake Hoyt: I'm here for Alonzo.

David Shaw: Excuse me sir, can you spare 400 grand?
Steven: I don't see why not.

[interrogation] Reciprocity, Mr. Hudgens, is the key to every relationship.

Captain Dudley Smith

It was a really awful day. I know, I made sure of it. So pick up the cookie, dip it in the milk, and eat it.

Ana Pascal

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