James Canter: The first time I heard you sing... I thought that it must be what angels sound like. Thought I died and gone to heaven.
Kelly Canter: I love that story.
James Canter: 'Cause it's true.

Tell you what. The truth is... sometimes I miss you so much I can hardly stand it.

Jack Twist

Let's make some fuckin' money, folks.

Rick Spector

Cameron: It's about time you realize what it's like to be black.
Christine: Oh, and you're talking about being black? The closest you ever came to being black, Cameron, was watching the Cosby Show.
Cameron: Well, at least I didn't watch it with the rest of the equestrian team.

Trixie: Was that a ninja?
Pops Racer: More like a "non"-ja.

[addressing players] Let me put it to you as clean as I can. We have 95 players here so accomplished as athletes in high school, we gave them scholarships to the finest football program in the land. NCAA regulations allow us to dress just 60 for home games. That means 35 scholarship players will be watching the games from the stands. Now, if any of you has any dreams of one day running out of that tunnel with your gold helmet shining in the sun, you'd best leave them right here. Of you 15 dreamers out there, maybe we'll keep one or two. My job is to basically beat the shit out of you for the next five days. Our first teams are gonna pound on you like you're their worst enemies. Your greatest value to us is that we don't care if you get hurt. Like what you hear so far? Anybody want to run home to Mama? Joe, they're all yours.

Coach Warren

[reading her poem] You've heard the story of Jesse James / Of how he lived and died / If you're still in need / Of something to read / Here's the story of Bonnie and Clyde. / Now Bonnie and Clyde are the Barrow gang / I'm sure you all have read / How they rob and steal / And those who squeal / Are usually found dyin' or dead. / They call them cold-hearted killers / They say they are heartless and mean / But I say this with pride / That I once knew Clyde / When he was honest and upright and clean. / But the laws fooled around / Kept takin' him down / And lockin' him up in a cell / Till he said to me

Bonnie Parker

Vanessa Bell: Virginia.
Virginia Woolf: Leonard thinks it's the end of civilization: People who are invited at 4 and arrive at 2:30.
Vanessa Bell: Oh God.
Virginia Woolf: Barbarians.

Nieman, you're done.

Terence Fletcher

Saul Bloom: Do you have any idea how vulnerable a fetus' brain is to the electromagnetic field created by your cell phone? You might as well point a gun at her stomach!
Bruce Willis: I'm Bruce Willis.

Who do we want to hear? Malcolm X! Are we gonna bring him on? Yes, we gonna bring him on. Well let us hear from our minister, Minister Malcolm X. Let us bring him on with a round of applause!

Announcer

Chase Collins: Say it! "I"
Caleb Danvers: I
Chase Collins: "will"
Caleb Danvers: will
Chase Collins: "you-"
Caleb Danvers: you... nothing.

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