They fuck you and fuck you and fuck you, and just when you think it's over, that's when the real fucking begins!

Conrad

Conrad: I've been here before.
Nicholas: I took you here for your birthday.
Conrad: No, I used to buy crystal meth from the Maitre D.

Nicholas: There goes a thousand dollars.
Christine: Your shoes cost a thousand dollars?
Nicholas: That one did.

Discovering the object of the game *is* the object of the game.

Daniel Schorr

[picking up a vinyl record] Ahh Graham Nash - Songs For Beginners. Just... just the album cover alone, look at that face, he knows he made a great record.

Charlie Fineman

I have no one. At least you two have each other.

Charlie Fineman

I even see the dog, that's how fucked up I still am. I see a man walking his German shepherd and I see our god damn poodle.

Charlie Fineman

Better bring out the big guns on this one. She's crazy with a side of crazy!

Alan Johnson

Charlie Fineman: Are you a faggot?.
Alan Johnson: Don't say faggot, you just don't call people faggot that's rude.
Charlie Fineman: To a gay guy it is, to you it's just a funny word like poundcake or pickle... You really need some Mel.
Charlie Fineman: [ordering tickets] Take one adult and one faggot.

You're a good husband Alan. You remind me of me.

Charlie Fineman

He likes you Alan, you know why? Because you know nothing about his family.

Sugarman

Charlie Fineman: Can he go out? Is he allowed out?
Alan Johnson: Don't do that, dont ask my wife permisson for me to go out.
Charlie Fineman: Alright, you're right. Can you go out?

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