[to Grace] I never had a girlfriend before. I'll never forget you.


I kissed a Smurf, and liked it?


What do you get when you cross a Smurf with a cow? Blue cheese!


Narrator Smurf: And so the Smurfs left this great city of New York. And I think they left it a little sweeter, a little wiser, a little smurfier. And as that portal began to close for the last time...
Grouchy: Hey! Seriously, stop!

Gargamel: I am not obsessed with Smurfs, thank you, I simply can't stop thinking about these little blue beasts every single moment of every single day!... But I need them! It's only by capturing the little munchkins and extracting their happy blue essence that my magic will finally become... not infallible...
Azrael: Meow!
Gargamel: INVINCIBLE, yes, thank you! I shall become the most powerful wizard in all of the world!

There is a place. A place that knows no sadness, where even feeling blue is a happy thing. A place inhabited by little blue beings three apples high. It lies deep within an enchanted forest, hidden away beyond the medieval village. Most people believe this place is made up, only to be found in books or children's imagination. Well, we beg to differ.

Narrator Smurf

There comes a time, thief, when the jewels cease to sparkle, when the gold loses its luster, when the throne room becomes a prison, and all that is left is a father's love for his child.

King Osric

To the hell fires with Thulsa Doom. He's evil; a sorcerer who can summon demons. His followers' only purpose is to die in his service. Thousands of them.


All my life I've been alone. Many times I've faced death with no one to know. I would look into the huts and the tents of others in the coldest dark and I would see figures holding each other in the night. But I always passed by.


Conan's Father: Fire and wind come from the sky, from the gods of the sky. But Crom is your god, Crom and he lives in the earth. Once, giants lived in the Earth, Conan. And in the darkness of chaos, they fooled Crom, and they took from him the enigma of steel. Crom was angered. And the Earth shook. Fire and wind struck down these giants, and they threw their bodies into the waters, but in their rage, the gods forgot the secret of steel and left it on the battlefield. We who found it are just men. Not gods. Not giants. Just men. The secret of steel has always carried with it a mystery. You must learn its riddle, Conan. You must learn its discipline. For no one - no one in this world can you trust. Not men, not women, not beasts.
Conan's Father: This you can trust.


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Purging is at last at hand. Day of Doom is here. All that is evil, all their allies; your parents, your leaders, those who would call themselves your judges; those who have lied and corrupted the Earth, they shall all be cleansed.

Thulsa Doom

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