Old Bilbo: No, thank you! We don't want any more visitors, well-wishers, or distant relations!
Gandalf: What about old friends?

[to Sauron] You should have stayed dead.

Elrond

Thorin Oakenshield: I am sorry that I made you a part of my perils...
Bilbo Baggins: No! I am glad to have shared in your perils - that is more than any Baggins deserves!

That is Dain Ironfoot, Thorin's cousin. I've always felt Thorin was the more reasonable of the two...

Gandalf

You are a very fine fellow, Mr Baggins, and I am very fond of you. But you are really just a little fellow, in a wide world.

Gandalf

Gandalf: Dragon sickness is a malady that affects all of us.
Gandalf: Well, almost all of us.

A philosopher once asked, "Are we human because we gaze at the stars, or do we gaze at them because we are human?" Pointless, really...”Do the stars gaze back?" Now *that's* a question.

Narrator

Is that your son? You cannot save him, Bowman! He will BURN!

Smaug

Secundus: [as he overlooks the balcony] I see the kingdom, father. The whole of Stormhold.
King: And...
Secundus: My kingdom?
King: Maybe... Look up.
[Secondus looks up to the sky, the king looks to Septimus. Septimus smiles and pushes Secondus off the balcony]

What do stars do? They shine.

Yvaine

Tristan: You sort of - glitter now. Is it... Is it normal?
Yvaine: Let's see if you can work it out for youself. What do stars do?
Tristan: Hmm... Attract trouble?
[Yvaine pushes him, amused]
Tristan: [grinning] All right, I'm sorry. Let me do another guess. Is it: Do they know exactly how to annoy a boy called Tristan Thorn?

Yvaine: [in the pirate ship] Tell me about Victoria.
Tristan: Well, she... she... There's nothing else to tell you.
Yvaine: The little I know about love is that it's unconditional. It's not something you can buy.
Tristan: Hang on! This wasn't about me trying to buy her love. This was to prove to her how I felt.
Yvaine: Ah... And what's she doing to prove how she feels about you?
Tristan: Well... Look, Yvaine, you'll understand when you meet her, all right? If we don't get murdered by pirates first.
Yvaine: Mmm... Murdered by pirates, heart torn out and eaten, meet Victoria... I can't quite decide which sounds more fun...

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