Lyle: I'm getting a NAD T770 digital decoder with 70-watt amps and Burr-Brown DACs.
Left Ear: [confused] Yeah...
Lyle: It's a big stereo. Speakers so loud, they blow women's clothes off!
Handsome Rob: Now you're talking!

If there's one thing I know, it's never to mess with mother nature, mother in-laws and, mother freaking Ukrainians.

Skinny Pete

I think about you all the time. I think about you even when you're with me. I look at you, I can't stop looking at you. I look at you, and I think, "That woman... That woman knows who I am and loves me anyway."

Ray Koval

Lyle: [Handsome Rob approaches Becky, the cable technician, in the parking lot. Lyle watches, amazed] Are you kidding me? How does he do that? How do you do that? What are you saying?
[Lyle narrates the conversation with alternating Handsome Rob and ditzy female voices]
Lyle: [speaking as Handsome Rob] Hey, how are you?
Lyle: [speaking as Becky] Oh, I'm good!
Lyle: [Handsome Rob] Nice to meet you. I'm Handsome Rob. And you are?
Lyle: [Becky] Oh, my name's Becky, but it's written on my shirt!
Lyle: [Handsome Rob] Listen, I'm gonna need your shirt, and your truck.
Lyle: [Becky] Perfect! I'll give them both to you. Would you like my virginity as well?
Lyle: [Handsome Rob] If it's on the menu.
Lyle: [Becky] Oh, you're so witty! Why don't you take advantage of me?
Lyle: [Handsome Rob] Yeah, you're not too bright, are you?
Lyle: [Becky] No.
Lyle: [Handsome Rob] Perfect.

Me? I've been a thief since I had baby teeth.

Charlie Croker

I trust everyone. It's the devil inside them I don't trust.

Stella Bridger

John Bridger: How are you?
Charlie Croker: [shrugging] I'm fine.
John Bridger: Fine? You know what "fine" stands for, don't you?
Charlie Croker: Unfortnately, yeah.
John Bridger: Freaked out...
Charlie Croker: Insecure...
John Bridger: Neurotic...
Charlie Croker: And Emotional.
John Bridger: You see those pillars over there?
Charlie Croker: [looks behind him and sees the pillars] What about them?
John Bridger: That's where they used to string up thieves who felt fine.
Charlie Croker: After you.

Terry Leather: Why'd you pick Kev and me? You could've found better thieves.
Martine Love: Old times sake.

Dave Shilling: What's down there?
Terry Leather: It's a pile of skeletons.
Dave Shilling: You're joking. Let's hope that's not the last gang who tried to take this bank.

Kevin Swain: We're not bank robbers.
Terry Leather: Maybe that's why we could get away with it.
Dave Shilling: It's a bit daunting, isn't it?
Terry Leather: You know what scares me more? Living and dying with nothing to show for it. You know how old Mozart was when he composed his first minuet?
Dave Shilling: No.
Terry Leather: Five. Five! A fucking minuet!
Kevin Swain: And how would you know that fact, Terry?
Terry Leather: Because it's tattooed on that stripper's ass, Kevin. What the fuck's it matter how I know? It's a fact and you're missing the point, Kev. What I'm trying to say is, we stop fucking about and stop picking the shit from under our fingernails.

Kevin Swain: [after being released] How the hell did that happen?
Terry Leather: Fucked if I know. Just keep walking.

Wendy Leather: The papers said there was a woman involved. Martine, was it? Was she involved?
Terry Leather: Yeah, she brought us the job in the first place.
Wendy Leather: Oh, and did you sleep with her Terry?

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