Did you know a young boy drowned here? He was my son. And today, is his birthday.

Pamela Voorhees

Hey, I'm not from around here, but I'm looking for my sister. She's gone missing.

Clay

[after smashing Paul's ankles with a sledgehammer] ... God I love you.

Annie Wilkes

I love you... I have a condom.

Matt

Jenna: Right now, I feel safer with him than I do with you.
Trent: You just dug your own grave, bitch.

Annie Wilkes: God came to me last night and told me your purpose for being here. I am going to help you write a new book.
Paul Sheldon: You think I can just whip one out?
Annie Wilkes: Oh, but I don't think Paul, I know.

Richie: Do you know how many lakes there are named Crystal-something? Go to the supermarket, every single bottled water is named 'Crystal' something!
Wade: Aquafina.

[to Lawrence about Bree] I would have better luck having sex with a penguin than I would with that girl.

Chewie

[while watching Bree dancing] In my next life I want to come back as one of the buttons on the ass pockets of her jean shorts.

Chewie

Have you forgotten how to drink that? First, you bring it to your lips. Then you blow it. Then you suck.

Bree

Mallick: What are you doing?
Brit: Being smart.

Sam Loomis: Bob! Run out and get yourself some lunch, will you?
Bob Summerfield: Oh, that's okay, Sam, I brought it with me.
Sam Loomis: Run out and eat it!

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