Vianne Rocher: Would you care to buy something special for your lady friend?
Guillaume Blerot: Lady friend?
Vianne Rocher: Yes, the lovely woman your dog was so fond of.
Guillaume Blerot: Oh, no, I mustn't. Madame Audel is in mourning for her husband.
Vianne Rocher: Oh. I'm sorry. When did he pass away?
Guillaume Blerot: The war. German grenade.
Vianne Rocher: Oh, I see. Well, it's been 15 years since the war, so...
Guillaume Blerot: No, not that war. Monsieur Audel was killed on the 12th January 1917. It was quite a blow to Mme Audel.
Vianne Rocher: Apparently so.

What's the decor? Early Mexican brothel?

Armande Voizin

A new addition to the liturgy?

Comte de Reynaud

Even the Comte de Reynaud felt strangely... released. Although it would take another six months for him to work up the courage to ask Caroline out to dinner.


Holly Kennedy: What if this is it, Gerry? What if this is all there is to our life? You have to have a plan. Why do I have to be the responsible grown up who worries? Why can't I be the cute, carefree Irish guy who sings all the time?
Gerry Kennedy: Because you can't sing without making dogs bark?

[Anouk has come home from school upset]
Vianne Rocher: Anouk, just tell me what happened?
Anouk Rocher: Are you Satan's helper?
Vianne Rocher: Well, it... it's not easy, being different.
Anouk Rocher: Why can't we go to church?
Vianne Rocher: Well, you can if you want... but it won't make things easier.
Anouk Rocher: Why can't you wear black shoes like the other mothers?

Luc Clairmont: [at confession] Each time I tell myself it's the last time, but then I get a whiff of her hot chocolate, or...
Madame Audel: ...Seashells. Chocolate seashells, so small, so plain, so *innocent*. I thought, oh, just one little taste, it can't do any harm. But it turned out they were filled with rich, sinful...
Yvette Marceau: ...And it *melts*, God forgive me, it melts ever so slowly on your tongue, and tortures you with pleasure.

Père Henri: [hearing confession] What else?
Guillaume Blerot: Impure thoughts. The woman who runs the chocolaterie...
Père Henri: Vianne Rocher?
Guillaume Blerot: She suggested I buy chocolate sea shells for the widow Audel. And, well... I guess that got me to thinking, about the widow Audel.
Père Henri: At her age? At *your* age?
Guillaume Blerot: Yes, and yes.

Andie: Does Princess Sophia want to come out and play?
Ben: Who's Princess Sophia?
[Andie points at his crotch]
Andie: Little, big, little, big... I don't know... we will find out!
Ben: You can't name my member... Princess Sophia.
Andie: Yes, I can!
Ben: If you are gonna name my... member, you have to name it something hyper masculine. Something like Spike, or Butch, or Krull the Warrior King!

You dumb stubborn redneck hick.

Melanie Carmichael

so, are you a bitch or a butch?


Johnny: What's your real name, Baby?
Baby: Frances. For the first woman in the cabinet.
Johnny: Frances. That's a real grown up name.

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