Marisa: I mean, I don't know what I'm doing here, Steph. What am I doing? This is all a lie.
Stephanie Kehoe, Maid: No, honey. It's more like a dream, you know? And for one night, you're living it for all of us. Don't think about tomorrow. Don't think about anything but tonight. Tonight, the maid is a lie. And this, this is who you really are.

Caroline: At least let me buy you lunch. After all, we've only got each other to get through this humiliation.
Christopher: Caroline, the first lunch was a mistake. A second would be complete torture.
Caroline: Drinks, then?

Andie: Our love fern! You let it die!
Ben: No, honey, it's just sleeping.

Marisa: Marisa Ventura. Housekeeping.
Christopher: Chris Marshall. Candidate for Senate. I'd appreciate your vote.
Marisa: We'll see.

[meeting Marisa's son, Ty]
Christopher: I'm Chris.
Jerry Siegel: I'm bald and no one in particular.
Ty: I know who you are.
Christopher: Yeah? What do you know?
Ty: I know that you're the state assemblyman. I know that you're thinking of running for Senator. I know your voting record and your consistent stand on environmental causes.

Andie: True or False: All's fair in love and war.
Ben: True.
Andie: Great answer.
Ben: Good question!

Jenna: Wait, listen to me. I'm 13!
Lucy: Jenna, if you're gonna start lying about your age, I'd go with 27.

Lucy: Can you get in the car?
Jenna: I can't get in the car, I don't get in the car with strangers.
Lucy: Please get in the car, we're gonna be late.
Jenna: I can't get in the car, I don't know you.
Lucy: Just get in the car.
Jenna: I don't get in the car with strangers!
Lucy: You're being a little paranoid.

I saw his thingy!

Jenna

Like, do blondes, like, do they really have more fun?

Andie

Matty! It's Thriller!

Jenna

Becky: I like your dress.
Jenna: That's because I have these incredible boobs to fill it out!

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