Service me bitch


Marisa: The first time you saw me, I was cleaning your bathroom floor! Only you didn't see me.
Christopher: What was I supposed to do, introduce myself while I'm taking a leak?

Andrew Paxton: [on the phone with his mom on why he can't come home for the weekend] I know. I know. Tell Gammie I'm sorry. What do you want me to tell you, she's making me work late again. I've worked to hard for this and I'm sure that dad is pissed.
[seeing Margaret come towards him]
Andrew Paxton: But we take all our submissions very seriously and we'll get back to you as soon as we can.
Margaret Tate: Was that your family?
Andrew Paxton: Yes.
Margaret Tate: Tell you to quit?
Andrew Paxton: Every single day.

This isn't The Graduate, this is Deliverance!


We are all programmed to believe that if a guy acts like a total jerk that means he likes you.


So, how's my butt?

Sam Baldwin

Sam Baldwin: Didn't you see Fatal Attraction?
Jonah Baldwin: You wouldn't let me!
Sam Baldwin: Well I saw it and it scared the shit out of me. It scared the shit out of every man in America.

Marriage is hard enough without bringing such low expectations into it.


When a man is a widower why do we say he was widowed? Why don't we say he was widowered?

Annie Reed

Jeff: [to Sarah in the elevator, after she has apologized] If we have a daughter, Beau Burroughs doesn't come within a thousend miles of her.
Sarah: It stops with me!

We'll always have Paris. We didn't have, we, we lost it until you came to Casablanca. We got it back last night.


I will always love but the fact is you don't know me and I'm just a stranger.


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