I have great insight. I'd use it on myself only I don't have any problems.

Alex Fletcher

Frat boy #1: [during a struggle with an old sword] When was that last time you had this thing sharpened?
Ben 'Finn' Finnegan: [gasping] 1750.

Lisa Houseman: Oh, my God. Look at that! Ma, I should have brought my coral shoes. You said I was taking too much!
Marjorie Houseman: Well, sweetheart, you brought ten pairs.
Lisa Houseman: But the coral shoes match that dress!
Jake Houseman: This is not a tragedy. A tragedy is three men trapped in a mine, or police dogs used in Birmingham.
Baby: Monks burning themselves in protest.
Lisa Houseman: Butt out, Baby.

Ben 'Finn' Finnegan: If we don't go after that treasure, it's going to haunt us for the rest of our lives and you know it. You really think I'd lie about something liek this?
Tess Finnegan: Why not? You're liar.
Ben 'Finn' Finnegan: This is such an inappropriate time to dwell on that!

Ben 'Finn' Finnegan: We found something. I mean we found something!
[pull out a barrel from a hole dug]
Tess Finnegan: What if it's a body?
Ben 'Finn' Finnegan: Well he was a midget, with very cheap relatives.
Tess Finnegan: What if it's a head?
Ben 'Finn' Finnegan: [pauses and turns around] Do you mind?

Tess Finnegan: [together with Finn in an underground room] Don't even think about it.
Ben 'Finn' Finnegan: What?
Tess Finnegan: Don't what me. You know what.

We just had sex in a church! I can't believe we haven't been struck buy lightening yet!

Tess Finnegan

[to Tess while waiting on Finn] Your married a guy for sex and then expected him to be smart.

Tess's Laywer

Will Hayes: I had two serious girlfriends... and then some other smattering of other women.
Maya Hayes: What's the boy word for 'slut'?
Will Hayes: They still haven't come up with one yet.

Maya Hayes: What's a threesome?
Will Hayes: It's a game, that adults play sometimes... When they're bored.
Maya Hayes: ...Whatever.

Just put your pickle on everybody's plate college boy and leave the hard stuff to me.

Johnny

Dennis Reed: It rains nine months a year in Seattle.
Annie Reed: I know!

FREE Movie Newsletter