Gerry Kennedy: Kiss me arse!
Holly Kennedy: Kiss mine! In English!

[knowing that Holly is angry with him] Are you going to make me sleep in the tub again?

Gerry Kennedy

Daniel Connelly: What do women want?
Holly Kennedy: [whispering] We have no idea what we want.
Daniel Connelly: I knew it!

Denise Hennessey: Are you single?
Guy with Clipboard: Yes.
Denise Hennessey: Are you gay?
Guy with Clipboard: Yes.
[Denise walks away]
Denise Hennessey: [a few frames later] Are you single?
Ted: Yes.
Denise Hennessey: Are you gay?
Ted: No.
Denise Hennessey: Are you working?
Ted: No.

Holly Kennedy: What do you think?
Daniel Connelly: I think you're hot!
Holly Kennedy: [gasps]
Daniel Connelly: Sorry, I have a syndrome.

Holly Kennedy: What if this is it, Gerry? What if this is all there is to our life? You have to have a plan. Why do I have to be the responsible grown up who worries? Why can't I be the cute, carefree Irish guy who sings all the time?
Gerry Kennedy: Because you can't sing without making dogs bark?

All women become like their mothers; that is their tragedy. No man does; that's his.

Aunt Mitzi

You know, I never told you this, but they based a movie on my family. Seriously. Titanic. They changed it a little. There's not boat, nothing sank. But I did pose naked for a portrait once.


If you're gonna marry someone you might as well marry your best friend.


This isn't The Graduate, this is Deliverance!


Life is short, but marriage is long... so drink up, and it will make it go a hell of a lot faster.


Katherine: [meeting Jeff] You don't look like a lawyer...
Jeff: You don't look like a Grandma.
Katherine: You ARE a lawyer! Full of shit.

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