[speaking to Optimus Prime through his window] Okay, listen. You got to listen to me. If my parents come out here and see you, they're going to freak out. My mother's got a temper.

Sam 'Spike' Witwicky

Sam 'Spike' Witwicky: [talking into phone] My car is alive...
[from trailer]
Sam 'Spike' Witwicky: [to Bumblebee] You're my Guardian?

This thing is wicked!

Captain Lennox

[seeing Starscream attacking the city] We're so dead.

Captain Lennox

Sam 'Spike' Witwicky: No, no, no, no, no.
Mikaela: What?
[Optimus Prime jumps onto the highway]
Mikaela: Oh my God...
[Bonecrusher, rams a bus]

Stop! He's not going to hurt you!

Sam 'Spike' Witwicky

Barricade: Are you LadiesMan217?
Sam 'Spike' Witwicky: Uh...
Barricade: ARE YOU LADIESMAN217?
Sam 'Spike' Witwicky: Uh Yes! Yes!

Sam 'Spike' Witwicky: So...
Maggie Madsen: What are you here for?
Sam 'Spike' Witwicky: I bought a car. Turned out to be an alien robot.
Glen: [whispered] Wow...!
Sam 'Spike' Witwicky: Who knew?

I bought a car. Turn out to be an alien robot... who knew?

Sam 'Spike' Witwicky

[him and his team surrounding a helicopter] Have your crew step out, OR WE WILL KILL YOU!
[Blackout transforms and attacks... ]

Captain Lennox

[to Frenzy] Not so tough without your head, are ya?

Sam 'Spike' Witwicky

Ron 'Sparkplug' Witwicky: [drives past a Porsche dealer] I've got a little surprise for you, son.
Sam 'Spike' Witwicky: No, no, no, no! Dad! Oh, you've got to be kidding me!
Ron 'Sparkplug' Witwicky: Yeah, I am. You're not getting a Porsche!

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