Kevin: Wait, what are those?
Jane: Nothing.
Kevin: Are those?
Jane: NO.
Kevin: Are they bridesmaid dresses?
Jane: This is none of your business!
Kevin: Ohhh... good God. What, you kept them all? You have a whole closet full, why?
Jane: I have a lot of friends and I like to keep them.
Kevin: Right. Well, that makes complete sense because they're... beautiful.
Jane: Some of them are not that bad.
Kevin: Not that bad? I'd like to see one of them that's not that bad.

You kinda look like a shiny mermaid.


Jane: I think you should just admit that you're a big softy. That this whole cynical thing is just an act so that you can seem wounded, and mysterious, and sexy.
Kevin: [pause] . Woah, woah, woah. What was the last one?
Jane: What?
Kevin: Did you say sexy?
Jane: What?
Kevin: Do you think I'm sexy?
Jane: No.
Kevin: Its OK if you do.
Jane: I don't.

Jane: [after passing out] Are you a doctor?
Kevin: No, but Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Drunk were bugging me.

I feel like I just found out my favorite love song was written about a sandwich.


Jane: Wanna go find the ugliest stuff in the store and register Tess for it?
Kevin: Let's do it.

You would rather hang out with Italian models than come with me to my *awesome* work party?


Jane's Aunt: Must be so hard to watch your younger sister get married before you.
Jane: Yes. Then I remember that I still get to have hot hate sex with random strangers and I feel SO much better!

Love is patient, love is kind, love is slowly going out of your mind


Tess: You won't share that information with me about him. You wouldn't hurt a fly. Besides, I'm your sister.
Jane: That was yesterday. Today you're just the bitch who broke my heart and cut up my mother's wedding dress.

You'd rather focus on other people's Kodak moments than make memories of your own!


Jane: Oh yeah, I'm a real good caulker.
Kevin: [into recorder] Likes caulk.

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27 Dresses Quotes

Kevin: [in Jane's apartment, with her showing off her dresses as she pulls out a loud-looking Gone With The Wind dress] What is that?
Jane: [holding the dress up to herself] Theme wedding!
Kevin: What was the theme? Humiliation?

Jane: I never do anything like this.
Kevin: I know.
Jane: You do?
Kevin: Yes, you kept repeating that over and over last night - I never do anything like this... I NEVER do anything like this... I never do ANYTHING like this...