Jane: Oh yeah, I'm a real good caulker.
Kevin: [into recorder] Likes caulk.

Jane: I think you should just admit that you're a big softy. That this whole cynical thing is just an act so that you can seem wounded, and mysterious, and sexy.
Kevin: [pause] . Woah, woah, woah. What was the last one?
Jane: What?
Kevin: Did you say sexy?
Jane: What?
Kevin: Do you think I'm sexy?
Jane: No.
Kevin: Its OK if you do.
Jane: I don't.

What color is that - vomit?


Kevin: What about you? You don't have any needs?
Jane: No. I'm Jesus.

Can you please find somebody else to be creepy with?


Kevin: Jane, can I have $50?
Jane: No.
Kevin: Jane, can I have $50?
Jane: No.
Kevin: [takes hand lovingly] Jane, I REALLY need $50, can i have the $50?
Jane: [hesitant] ... No?
Kevin: [laughing] See? That was good!
[grabs Jane's drink]
Kevin: Jane, can I have your drink?
Jane: Sure.

You'd rather focus on other people's Kodak moments than make memories of your own!


Tess: You won't share that information with me about him. You wouldn't hurt a fly. Besides, I'm your sister.
Jane: That was yesterday. Today you're just the bitch who broke my heart and cut up my mother's wedding dress.

Love is patient, love is kind, love is slowly going out of your mind


Jane's Aunt: Must be so hard to watch your younger sister get married before you.
Jane: Yes. Then I remember that I still get to have hot hate sex with random strangers and I feel SO much better!

You would rather hang out with Italian models than come with me to my *awesome* work party?


Jane: Wanna go find the ugliest stuff in the store and register Tess for it?
Kevin: Let's do it.

FREE Movie Newsletter

27 Dresses Quotes

Kevin: [in Jane's apartment, with her showing off her dresses as she pulls out a loud-looking Gone With The Wind dress] What is that?
Jane: [holding the dress up to herself] Theme wedding!
Kevin: What was the theme? Humiliation?

Jane: I never do anything like this.
Kevin: I know.
Jane: You do?
Kevin: Yes, you kept repeating that over and over last night - I never do anything like this... I NEVER do anything like this... I never do ANYTHING like this...