[to Goldmember] There are only two things I can't stand in this world. People who are intolerant of other people's cultures... and the Dutch.

Nigel Powers

Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to my submarine lair. It's long, hard and full of seamen! [silence] No? Nothing? Not even a titter? Tough sub...

Dr. Evil

Well, congratulations numb nuts... you've succeeded in turning me into a frickin' Jack in the box. Get it off! Get it off! It's dark, it's dark!

Dr. Evil

Unfortunately, my neck does look like a vagina.

Fat Bastard

Twins, Basil. Twins.

Britney Spears: Is it true what they say about you?
Mini-me: [whispers in her ear]
Britney Spears: Kickstand? Can I give you my cell phone number? Please?

Are those fricken' sharks with fricken' laser beams attached to their fricken' heads?

Dr. Evil

Sha-zam.

Foxxy Cleopatra

Nigel Powers: [rubs throat] Ow...
Austin Powers: What's wrong with your neck?
Nigel Powers: I took a Viagra, got stuck in me throat, I've had a stiff neck for hours.
Austin Powers: I thank you!

Goldmember: Dr. Evil, we still have the ultimate insurance policy. May I present to you, the very sexual, the very toite, Austin Power's fahza.
Dr. Evil: His what?
Number 2: His fahza, Dr. Evil.
Dr. Evil: His farger? What's a farger?
Goldmember: His fahza. You know, the fahza.
Dr. Evil: You know Goldmember, I don't speak freaky-deaky Dutch. Okay, perv boy?
Goldmember: Fahza, his dad, dad is fahza.
Dr. Evil: Oh, his dad. His FA-THER.

Well, the future better get ready for me. 'Cause I'm Foxxy Cleopatra, and I'm a WHOLE LOTTA WOMAN.

Foxxy Cleopatra

I'm from Holland. Isn't that vierd?

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Austin Powers in Goldmember Quotes

[to Goldmember] There are only two things I can't stand in this world. People who are intolerant of other people's cultures... and the Dutch.

Nigel Powers

Got an issue? Here's a tissue.

Nigel Powers