I'm just lookin' for a little slap and pickle!

Barry Badrinath

Barry Badrinath: [about Great Gam Gam] All I'm saying is... that whore thing could be a real possibility. Some of my best friends are whores.
Jan Wolfhouse: We know, Barry.

Barry Badrinath: [about the past] Come on, buddy. Can we bury the hatchet? I mean, we both know your wife just sat there taking it like a plastic fuck doll.
Todd Wolfhouse: I happened to MARRY that plastic fuck doll!

Steve "Fink" Finklestein: Come on, guys. I'm a respected member of the scientific community. I've been published in four journals.
Landfill: Which one? Toad Load Weekly?

Gunter: [about Johan] He then fled to America with his mother, a common Bavarian... what is word I'm looking for? WHORE!
Todd Wolfhouse: Gam Gam a whore? I think something must have been lost in the translation.
Gunter: HOOKER! PROSTITUTE! SLUT FOR MONEY!

Todd Wolfhouse: Jim Tobleson said they called in a hostage negotiator
Landfill: Jim Tobleson's a fucking Chatty Cathy! I did my three years up at the county pen. Made some friends, went Muslim. Now I'm out, praise Allah.

I'll show you how to chug a beer, mother fucker!

Steve "Fink" Finklestein

Todd Wolfhouse: We've got to go back and get grandpa's ashes.
Jan Wolfhouse: You go, I'm never leaving this place.

I always sleep better with a little sausage in me.

Great Gam Gam

Barry Badrinath: It's $10 for a BJ, $12 for an HJ, $15 for a ZJ...
Landfill: [Interrupting] What's a ZJ?
Barry Badrinath: If you have to ask, you can't afford it.
Steve "Fink" Finklestein: [Trying to persuade Landfill] I've got $4.

I wish it were winter so we could freeze it into ice blocks and skate on it and melt it in the spring time and drink it!

Barry Badrinath

[upon waking up after the first night of training, next to a deer he killed with his teet] Oh no, not again!

Barry Badrinath

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Beerfest Quotes

Barry Badrinath: It's $10 for a BJ, $12 for an HJ, $15 for a ZJ...
Landfill: [Interrupting] What's a ZJ?
Barry Badrinath: If you have to ask, you can't afford it.
Steve "Fink" Finklestein: [Trying to persuade Landfill] I've got $4.

I wish it were winter so we could freeze it into ice blocks and skate on it and melt it in the spring time and drink it!

Barry Badrinath