Colonel Oates: Get down and give me infinity.
Bill: There is no way we could possibly do infinity push-ups.
Ted: Well maybe if he lets us do them girly-style...

I got a full-on robot chubby.

Evil Ted

...and very important, DO NOT do your homework without wearing headphones. Repeat...

Rufus

You're not strong! You're silky boys! Silk comes from the butts of Chinese Worms!

Colonel Oates

[rapping] You might be a king or a little street sweeper, but sooner or later you'll dance with the reaper.

Grim Reaper

Bill: Hey Ted? Wanna play 20 questions?
Ted: Okay! I got one!
Bill: Is it a mineral?
Ted: Yeah!
Bill: Are you a tank?
Ted: Whoa! Yeah!

Grim Reaper: I believe Colonel Mustard did it in the study with a candlestick.
Bill: Sorry, death, you lose! It was Professor Plum!
Grim Reaper: I said Plum!
Ted: No way! You said Mustard! Can we go back now?
Grim Reaper: Uh, best three out of five!
Ted: I don't believe this guy!

Bill: Ted, it's the Grim Reaper!
Ted: Oh, how's it hangin' Death?

Don't overlook my butt, I work out all the time. And reaping burns a lot of calories.

Grim Reaper

Bill: Hey Ted. Don't fear the reaper.
[air guitar]
Grim Reaper: I heard that!

Bill: Ted, you know, if I die, you can have my Megadeth collection.
Ted: But dude, we are already dead.
Bill: Oh. Well then they're yours, dude.

You totally killed us, you evil metal dickweeds!

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Bill & Ted's Bogus Journey Quotes

[rapping] You might be a king or a little street sweeper, but sooner or later you'll dance with the reaper.

Grim Reaper

Bill: Hey Ted? Wanna play 20 questions?
Ted: Okay! I got one!
Bill: Is it a mineral?
Ted: Yeah!
Bill: Are you a tank?
Ted: Whoa! Yeah!