Fate! There is such a thing as fate, but it only takes you so far. Then it's up to you to make it happen.

Angel Stripper

You know what they say about women and trolley cars. There's plenty of 'em in the sea.

William

Mike Dexter: Guys, we're gonna be in college soon. You know what there's gonna be in college, right?
Jake: Girls that used to be in high school.
Mike Dexter: No, women. College women. Women with no curfew, women on the pill, women... women, bro. We are staring into the future here. And the future is women.

Kenny Fisher: I mean peep this - They say here 92 percent of the honeys at UCLA are sexually active. 92 percent of the women in Los Angeles at UCLA walking around going, "Class... or sex? What shall I do?" 92 percent, yo! Hey, you know what that means?
Ritchie Koolboy: What?
Kenny Fisher: It means I gots a 92 percent chance of embarrassing myself. I roll up on that shorty be like, "What's up yo?" she be like, "You don't know 20 different ways to make me call you Big Poppa" cuz I don't yo.

I don't know about you, but I really believe that there's one person out there, and for me it's gotta be Amanda.

Preston

Amanda Beckett: Hi, umm... Do you happen to know who Preston Myers is?
Earth Girl: D'uh. He only sat like, right next to you in freshman English. But I guess you wouldn't remember that. I mean, why would Amanda Beckett pay any attention to a unique spirit like Preston, or even a unique spirit like me? Maybe it's because she's a little busy ordering around her little conformist flock of sheep. SHEEP! You are all sheep! Baaaaah!

Kenny Fisher: 'Sup, ladies? Yo Jana, wanna dance?
Jana: I'm allergic.
Kenny Fisher: You're allergic to dancing?
Jana: Yeah.

[thinking] All right this is it. It is finally time for Kenny Fisher to become... da man. Now I've done my laps, and all ten finalists are present and accounted for. Ten lovely ladies, yo. Each one at my disposal. Ten willing and able tour guides into the theme park of love. But who will it be? Which of you gorgeous ten will be the lucky one?

Kenny Fisher

Angel Stripper: Oh I'm the weird one? You're the one calling Barry Mannilow from a phone booth at 2:00 am!

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[to Denise Fleming] I did not write 'Denise Fleming is a tampon' on your locker!

Kenny Fisher

Woman, this is all your fault. Come bargin' in here like a friggin' moose.

Kenny Fisher

Mike Dexter: Who's gonna want you now?
Amanda Becket: [Looking at letter] Somebody.
Mike Dexter: Somebody? More like... nobody!
Amanda Becket: Gosh, Mike. You really got me.

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Can't Hardly Wait Quotes

Nobody drink the beer, the beer has gone bad!

William

Would you like to touch my penis? I am a sex machine!

Exchange student