
Popular Clerks II Quotes
Dante Hicks: Can you feel it?
Randal Graves: Feel what?
Dante Hicks: Today is the first day of the rest of our lives.
Elias: If he's gonna jerk off, I'm gonna jerk off, too
Randal Graves: I don't think he's gonna jerk off.
Randal Graves: Ladies and gentlemen, and you, Elias! Straight from the debauchery capital of the world, TI-juana Mexico!
Dante Hicks: Oh, God, no.
Randal Graves: Oh, God, yes!
What's the point of having an Internet connection if you're not using it to look up weird, fucked-up pictures of dirty sex you'd never have yourself?
Randal Graves
What'd you do that for? You realize he just thinks you're trying to get him into a threeway with us now, don't you?
Dante Hicks
You know, sometimes I wish I did a little more with my life instead of hanging out in front of places selling weed and shit. Like, maybe be an animal doctor. Why not me? I like seals and shit. Or maybe an astronaut. Yeah... be the first motherfucker to see a new galaxy, or find a new alien life form... and fuck it. People would be like, "There he goes. Homeboy fucked a Martian once."
Jay
May your first child be a masculine child!
Randal Graves
... I got nothing.
Silent Bob
That guy's being awfully forward with that donkey.
Jay
I got to rent movies, fuck with assholes, and hang out with my best friend, Dante.
Randal Graves
[wasted] I hope that donkey doesn't have a heinie troll!
Elias
Randal Graves: You're in the bestiality business.
Sexy Stud: Hey. Fucko. We like to call it inter-species erotica.
Randal Graves: Intriguing.