Dan: I fell in love.
Alice: Oh, as if you had no choice? There's a moment, there's always a moment, "I can do this, I can give into this, or I can resist it," and I don't know when your moment was, but I bet you there was one.

What's so great about the truth? Try lying for a change, it's the currency of the world.


Larry: Alice, tell me something that's true.
Alice: Lying's the most fun a girl can have without taking her clothes off - but it's better if you do.

Dan: And you left him, just like that?
Alice: It's the only way to leave. "I don't love you anymore. Goodbye."
Dan: Supposing you do still love them?
Alice: You don't leave.
Dan: You've never left someone you still love?
Alice: Nope.

Dan: Didn't fancy my sandwiches?
Alice: Don't eat fish.
Dan: Why not?
Alice: Fish piss in the sea.
Dan: So do children.
Alice: Don't eat children either.

Dan: You think love is simple. You think the heart is like a diagram.
Larry: Have you ever seen a human heart? It looks like a fist, wrapped in blood! Go fuck yourself! You writer! You liar!

Anna: I'm sorry you're...
Larry: Don't say it! Don't you fucking say you're too good for me. I am, but don't say it.

Dan: [impersonating a woman in a chat room] DDW: wait have 2 type with 1 hand am cumming right now... ohohohohoh ohoho hohohohoh ohohohoo hohoooo ooooooooooo oooo oooooooo oooooooooo oooooo oooooo+_*&^%$£!£$%&*&*^%&^%$££D!$ %^&**&**&&*12 3038948485 75us7sjc7d78s8 7o/s8 78us uiu7sbom/
Larry: DOC9: was it good?
Dan: DDW: no

Dan: You love her like a dog loves its owner.
Larry: And the owner loves the dog for so doing.
Dan: You'll hurt her. You'll never forgive her.
Larry: Of course I'll forgive her. I have forgiven her. Without forgiveness we're savages. You're drowning.

Anna: Why is the sex so important?
Larry: Because I'm a fucking caveman!

Customs Officer: Welcome back, Miss Jones.
Alice: Thank you.

Anna: We do everything that people who have sex do!
Larry: Do you enjoy sucking him off?
Anna: Yes!
Larry: You like his cock?
Anna: I love it!
Larry: You like him coming in your face?
Anna: Yes!
Larry: What does it taste like?
Anna: It tastes like you but sweeter!
Larry: That's the spirit. Thank you. Thank you for your honesty. Now fuck off and die, you fucked up slag.

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Closer Quotes

Where is this love? I can't see it, I can't touch it. I can't feel it. I can hear it. I can hear some words, but I can't do anything with your easy words.


Larry: You forget you're dealing with a clinical observer of the human carnival.
Anna: Am I, now?
Larry: Oh, yes.
Anna: You seem more like the cat that got the cream and couldn't stop licking himself.