So like, right now for example. The Haitians need to come to America. But some people are all, "What about the strain on our resources?" Well it's like when I had this garden party for my father's birthday, right? I put R.S.V.P. 'cause it was a sit-down dinner. But some people came that like did not R.S.V.P. I was like totally buggin'. I had to haul ass to the kitchen, redistribute the food, and squish in extra place settings. But by the end of the day it was, like, the more the merrier. And so if the government could just get to the kitchen, rearrange some things, we could certainly party with the Haitians. And in conclusion may I please remind you it does not say R.S.V.P. on the Statue of Liberty. Thank you very much.

Cher

[about keeping her virginity] You see how picky I am about my shoes ... and they only go on my feet!

Cher

Tai: Why should I listen to you, anyway? You're a virgin who can't drive.
Cher: That was way harsh, Tai.

Tai: Cher, I don't want to do this anymore. And my buns: they don't feel nothin' like steel.

What's with you, kid? You think the death of Sammy Davis left an opening in the Rat Pack?

Mel

Do you prefer "fashion victim" or "ensembly challenged"?

Cher

Dionne and I were both named after famous singers of the past, who now do infomercials.

Cher

Anything happens to my daughter, I got a .45 and a shovel, I doubt anybody would miss you.

Mel

Looks like we're gonna have to make a cameo at the Val party.

Cher

Josh: Hey, in some parts of the universe, maybe not in contempo-casual, but in some parts, it's considered cool to know what's going on in the world.
Cher: Thank you Josh. I SO need lessons from you on how to be cool. Tell me the part about Kenny G again?

Josh: Hey, James Bond, in America we drive on the right side of the road.
Cher: I am. You try driving in platforms.

I was surfing the crimson wave. I had to haul ass to the ladies'.

Cher

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Clueless Quotes

Anything happens to my daughter, I got a .45 and a shovel, I doubt anybody would miss you.

Mel

I feel like such a heifer. I had two bowls of Special K, 3 pieces of turkey bacon, a handful of popcorn, 5 peanut butter M&M's and, like, 3 pieces of licorice.

Cher