Cher: Been shopping with Dr. Suess?
Dionne: Well at least I wouldn't skin a collie to make my back pack.
Cher: It's faux.

Heather: It's just like Hamlet said, "To thine own self be true."
Cher: Hamlet didn't say that.
Heather: I think I remember Hamlet accurately.
Cher: Well, I remember Mel Gibson accurately, and he didn't say that. That Polonius guy did.

Christian said he'd call the next day, but in boy time that meant Thursday.

Cher

Dionne and her boyfriend Murray are in this dramatic relationship. I think they've seen that Ike and Tina Turner movie too many times.

Cher

Mr. Hall: So does anyone have any final thoughts on Cher's oration? Elton?
Elton: Yeah. I can't find my Cranberries CD. I gotta go to the quad before anyone snags it.

Cher's saving herself for Luke Perry.

Dionne

[seeking a match for her teacher] Unfortunately, There was a major babe drought at my school. The evil trolls from the math department were actually married and in the grand tradition of P.E. teachers, Ms. Stoger seemed to be same-sex oriented.

Cher

I would like to say this. Tardiness is not something you can do on your own. Many, many people contributed to my tardiness. I would like to thank my parents for never giving me a ride to school, the LA city bus driver who took a chance on an unknown kid and last but not least, the wonderful crew from McDonalds who spend hours making those egg McMuffins without which I'd never be tardy.

Travis

Dee, when your allergies act up, take out your nose ring.

Cher

Travis: I joined this program and there's steps. There's... uh...
Cher: Twelve?
Travis: Yeah, how'd you know?
Cher: Wild guess.

Cher: Would you call me selfish?
Dionne: No, not to your face.

Mel: So, what did you do in school today?
Cher: Well, I broke in my purple clogs.

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Clueless Quotes

Tai: Do you think she's pretty?
Cher: No, she's a full-on Monet.
Tai: What's a monet?
Cher: It's like a painting, see? From far away, it's OK, but up close, it's a big old mess. Let's ask a guy. Christian, what do you think of Amber?
Christian: Hagsville.
Cher: See?

Anything happens to my daughter, I got a .45 and a shovel, I doubt anybody would miss you.

Mel