One look at these Fargo quotes and it is clear that the Coen brothers' have "stiched" a crime classic.
Jerry Lundegaard: Well, we've never done this before. But seeing as it's special circumstances and all, he says I can knock a hundred dollars off that Trucoat.
Irate Customer: A hundred... You lied to me, Mr Lundegaard. You're a bald-faced liar. A... fucking liar. Where's my goddamn checkbook? Let's get this over with.
Airport Lot Attendant: There's a minimum charge of 4 dollars, long term parking charges by the day.
Carl Showalter: I guess you think you're... you know like an authority figure, with that stupid fucking uniform, huh buddy? King clip-on-tie there, big fucking man huh? You know these are the limits of your life man. The rule of your little fucking gate here. Here's your 4 dollars you pathetic piece of shit!
Gaer Grimsrud: Where is Pancake's House?
Carl Showalter: What?
Gaer Grimsrud: We stop at Pancake's House.
Norm Gunderson: They announced it.
Marge Gunderson: They announced it?
Norm Gunderson: Yeah.
Marge Gunderson: So?
Norm Gunderson: Three-cent stamp.
Marge Gunderson: Your mallard?
Norm Gunderson: Yeah.
Marge Gunderson: Oh, that's terrific.
Norm Gunderson: It's just a three-cent stamp.
Marge Gunderson: It's terrific.
Norm Gunderson: Hautman's blue-winged teal got the 29-cent. People don't much use the three-cent.
Marge Gunderson: Oh, for Pete's sake. Of course they do. Whenever they raise the postage, people need the little stamps.
[beating Carl] Fucking little weasel! Fuck you! You fucking motherfucker son of a bitch! Fucking cock! Jesus Christ! You fucking shitbag motherfucker!Shep Proudfoot
Carl Showalter: Alright Jerry, I'm through fucking around. You got the fucking money?
Jerry Lundegaard: Yeah, I got the money, but... uh...
Carl Showalter: Don't you fucking fuck me, Jerry. I want you to get this money to the Dayton Radisson, top level, in 30 minutes, Jerry, we wrap this thing up.
Jerry Lundegaard: Yeah, but...
Carl Showalter: Hey, you're there in 30 minutes Jerry or I find you Jerry and I shoot you and I shoot your fucking wife and I shoot all your fucking children and I shoot them all in the back of their little fucking heads, you got it?
Jerry Lundegaard: Okay, now you stay away from Scotty now.
Carl Showalter: Got it?
Gaear Grimsrud: Shut the fuck up! Or I'll throw you back in the trunk, you know?
Carl Showalter: Jesus, that's more than I've heard you say all week.
You stay away from me, man! Hey, smoke a fuckin' peace pipe!Carl Showalter
Norm Gunderson: I love you, Margie.
Marge Gunderson: I love you, Norm.
There's more to life than a little money, ya know. Don'tcha know that? And here ya are. And it's a beautiful day. Well. I just don't understand it.Marge Gunderson
And I guess that was your accomplice in the woodchipper.Marge Gunderson
Carl Showalter: Okay, here're the keys to my truck. I'm taking the car right now and gettin' out of here.
Gaer Grimsrud: We split that.
Carl Showalter: How the fuck do you split a car, you dummy? With a fucking chainsaw?