Heather Duke: Veronica, you look like hell.
Veronica Sawyer: Yeah? I just got back.

Your society nods its head at any horror the American teenager can think to bring upon itself.

J.D.

You were nothing before you met me. You were playing Barbies with Betty Finn. You were a Bluebird. You were a Brownie. You were a Girl Scout Cookie.

Heather Chandler

Great pate, mom, but I gotta motor if I wanna be ready for that party tonight.

Veronica Sawyer

It's one thing to want someone out of your life, but it's another thing to serve them a wake-up cup full of liquid drainer.

Veronica Sawyer

Kurt Kelly: Hey Ram, doesn't this cafeteria have a no fags allowed rule?
J.D.: Well, they seem to have an open door policy for assholes though don't they?

Transfer to Washington. Transfer to Jefferson. No one at Westerberg is going to let you play their reindeer games.

Heather Chandler

Grow up Heather, bulimia's so '87.

Heather Chandler

Chaos was what killed the dinosaurs, darling

J.D.

Veronica, why are you pulling my dick?

Heather Duke

You blow it tonight, girl, and it's keggers with kids all next year.

Heather Chandler

J.D.: Is your life perfect?
Veronica Sawyer: I'm on my way to a party at Remington University... No, my life's not perfect. I don't really like my friends.
J.D.: I... I don't really like your friends either.
Veronica Sawyer: Well, it's just like - they're people I work with, and our job is being popular and shit.
J.D.: Maybe it's time to take a vacation.

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Heathers Quotes

Heather Duke: Veronica, you look like hell.
Veronica Sawyer: Yeah? I just got back.

You were nothing before you met me. You were playing Barbies with Betty Finn. You were a Bluebird. You were a Brownie. You were a Girl Scout Cookie.

Heather Chandler