Looks like the upper hand, is on the other foot!

President Thomas 'Tug' Benson

Do you know what its like to have your heart shot out of season and tied to the top of a car? How it feels to be passed like the world's largest kidney stone? Ramada... I don't THINK so.

Topper Harley

Topper Harley: We both know you belong with Dexter. You're part of his work, the thing that keeps him going. I'm no good at being noble, but... do you have any idea what would happen if you stay here with me?
Ramada Rodham Hayman: Of course I do. Sex. Wild, free, passionate, unbridled sex. I would fondle you in ways you can't imagine. I would pleasure you at any time, in any place, in any way, for as long as you could possibly desire.

Topper Harley: I'm putty in your hands.
Michelle Huddleson: In my hands, nothing turns to putty.

Col. Denton Walters: It seems there were three bears. And one morning when their porridge was too hot, they went for a walk. And a little blond girl came skipping through the woods... she ate their porridge and she sat in their chairs... she slept in their beds. And when those bears returned and discovered that mess... Do you know what happened then Topper?
Topper Harley: No.
Col. Denton Walters: That little blond girl get scared. Ran away.
Topper Harley: So you're saying is that little blond girl is me. If this is about me coloring my hair...

Rabinowitz: What are you reading?
Topper: Great Expectations.
Rabinowitz: Is it any good?
Topper: It's not what I'd hoped for.

Ramada, I do love you. I've tried to forget you but no matter what, your face is on the tip of my tongue.

Topper Harley

I'm happy for you, kid. But if you think you can hurt me again, you're wrong. I left my heart in my other pants.

Topper Harley

I'm not saying I don't trust you, and I'm not saying I do. But I don't.

Topper Harley

President Thomas 'Tug' Benson: Here's the target area.
Gerou: That's Minnesota, sir.
President Thomas 'Tug' Benson: Damn it, man, that's the genius of my plan. Why go over there to fight? We can do it right here at home, and get in some good fishing while we're at it.
Gerou: Sir, the enemy is over there.
President Thomas 'Tug' Benson: Then we'll fly them over here. Their families too. We'll teach them to skate... Do I have to think of everything?

Every time I give an order, it gets screwed up! Plan a reception, wrong hors d'oeuvres. Appoint an ambassador, he leaves the country.

President Thomas 'Tug' Benson

Topper Harley: You're joking.
Ramada Rodham Hayman: I'm not.
Topper Harley: You've got to be.
Ramada Rodham Hayman: If I was joking I would say: "A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, 'Why the long face?'"

FREE Movie Newsletter

Hot Shots! Part Deux Quotes

These men have taken a supreme vow of celibacy, like their fathers, and their fathers before them...

Topper Harley

I'm not saying I don't trust you, and I'm not saying I do. But I don't.

Topper Harley