Rod Tidwell: Thanks for coming.
Jerry Maguire: I missed ya. What can I say? You're all I've got.

Jerry Maguire: I started talking to Dennis Wilburn about your re-negotiation this morning.
Rod Tidwell: Talking. Jerry Rice, Andre Reed, Chris Carter... I smell all these fools. They are making the big sweet dollars. They are making the... quan, and you are talking.

Dorothy: He's coming over.
Laurel: Tonight?
Dorothy: He just lost his best client. I invited the guy over.
Laurel: Dorothy, this is not a guy. It's a syndrome. Early mid-life. Hanging on to the bottom wrong. "Dear God, don't let me be alone or I call my newly long suffering assistent without medical for company settlement." If now all you still want is him to come over, I'm not saying anything.
Dorothy: Honey, he's engaged.

I don't like black people? I am Mister black people.

Jerry Maguire: What are you doing with me, Rod?
Rod Tidwell: Why?
Jerry Maguire: I'm finished, I'm fucked. Twenty four hours ago, man, I was hot! Now... I'm a cautionary tale. You see this jacket I'm wearing, you like it? Because I don't really need it. Because I'm cloaked in failure! I lost the number one draft picked the night before the draft! Why? Let's recap: Because a hockey player's kid made me feel like a superficial jerk. I ate two slices of bad pizza, went to bed and grew a conscience!
Rod Tidwell: Well, boo-f-cking-hoo
Laurel

Don't cry at the beginning of a date. Cry at the end, like I do.

Laurel

Look at me Laurel, I'm the oldest 26 year old in the world.

Dorothy

On the surface, everything seems fine. I've got this great guy. And he loves my kid. And he sure does like me a lot. And I can't live like that. It's not the way I'm built.

Dorothy

I got a shelf life of ten years, tops. My next contract's gotta bring me the dollars that'll last me and mine a long time. S-it, I'm out of this sport in 5 years. What's my family gonna live on? Huh?

Rod Tidwell

Anyone else would have left you by now, but I'm sticking with you. And if I have to ride your ass like Zorro, you're gonna show me the money.

Rod Tidwell

I'm still sort of moved by your "My word is stronger than oak" thing.

That's my mo-fo.

Tyson Tidwell

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Jerry Maguire Quotes

Don't ever stop fucking me!

Avery Bishop

You are hanging on by a very thin thread and I dig that about you!

Rod Tidwell