All people see when they look at me is blonde hair and big boobs.

Elle

Geez! Could I be any more goddamn spastic?

Paulette

Warner Huntington III: You got into Harvard Law?
Elle: What? Like, it's hard?

I would rather go to jail than lose my reputation.

Brooke

Brooke: I was getting... lipo.
Elle: What?
Brooke: LIPOSUCTION!

But if I'm going to have my own law firm by the time I'm 30, I need a boyfriend who's not such a complete bonehead.

Elle

Elle's Mother: Honey, you were First Runner-Up at the "Miss Hawaiian Tropics" contest. Why are you going to throw that all away?
Elle: Going to Harvard is the only way I'm going to get the love of my life back.
Elle's Father: Oh, sweetheart, you don't need law school. Law school is for people who are boring and ugly and serious. And you, button, are none of those things.

Elle: Here it is!
Professor Callahan: It’s pink...
Elle: Oh! And it's scented! I think it gives it a little something extra, don't you think? Ok, well, see you next class!

Elle: For that matter, any masturbatory emissions, where the sperm is clearly not seeking an egg, could be termed reckless abandonment.
Professor Callahan: You've just won your case.

Serena: Oh, look, there's Elle!
Serena: Elle, we came to see your trial and look! There's like a judge and everything... and jury people.
Margot: VOTE FOR ELLE!
The Honorable Marina R. Bickford: Ladies, take a seat!

Elle: I'm reading about the LSAT's
Serena: My cousin had that once. Apparently you get a really bad rash on your...

Elle: I don't need back-ups. I'm going to Harvard.
C.U.L.A. Advisor: Well then, you'll need excellent recommendations from your professors.
Elle: Okay.
C.U.L.A. Advisor: And a heck of an admissions essay.
Elle: Right.
C.U.L.A. Advisor: And at least a 175 on your LSATs.
Elle: I once had to judge a tighty-whitey contest for Lambda Kappa Pi. Trust me, I can handle anything.

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Legally Blonde Quotes

If you're going to let one stupid prick ruin your life... you're not the girl I thought you were.

Professor Stromwell

Isn't it the first cardinal rule of perm maintenance that you are forbidden to wet your hair for at least 24 hours after getting a perm at the risk of deactivating the ammonium thioglycolate?

Elle

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