You know what? Fuck beauty contests. Life is one fucking beauty contest after another. School, then college, then work... Fuck that. And fuck the Air Force Academy. If I want to fly, I'll find a way to fly. You do what you love, and fuck the rest!

Dwayne

Dwayne: I wish I could just sleep until I was eighteen and skip all this crap- high school and everything- just skip it.
Frank: You know Marcel Proust?
Dwayne: He's the guy you teach.
Frank: Yeah. French writer. Total loser. Never had a real job. Unrequited love affairs. Gay. Spent 20 years writing a book almost no one reads. But he's also probably the greatest writer since Shakespeare. Anyway, he uh- he gets down to the end of his life... and he looks back and decides that all those years he suffered- Those were the best years of his life, 'cause they made him who he was. All those years he was happy? You know, total waste. Didn't learn a thing. So, if you sleep until you're 18... Think of the suffering you're gonna miss. I mean high school? High school? Those are your prime suffering years. You don't get better suffering than that.

Richard: Sarcasm is the refuge of losers.
Frank: Really?
Richard: Sarcasm is losers trying to bring winners down to their level.
Frank: Thank you for opening my eyes to what a loser I am!

Olive: Grandpa, am I pretty?
Grandpa: You are the most beautiful girl in the world.
Olive: You're just saying that.
Grandpa: No! I'm madly in love with you and it's not because of your brains or your personality.

Pageant Official: What is your daughter doing?
Richard: She's kickin' ass... that's what she's doing.

Losers are people who are so afraid of not winning, they don't even try.

Grandpa

Frank: [recounting his suicide attempt] But he went and fell in love with a colleague of mine; Larry Sugarman, the number 2 expert on Marcel Proust in America.
Richard: Who's number 1?
Frank: That would be me, Richard.

Olive: I'd like to dedicate this to my grandpa, who showed me these moves.
Pageant MC: Aww, that is so sweet.
[Audience applauds]
Pageant MC: Is he here? Where's your grandpa right now?
Olive: In the trunk of our car.

Grandpa: Again with the fucking chicken.
Richard: Dad.
Grandpa: It's always with the goddamn fucking chicken.

I can say what I want - I still got Nazi bullets in my ass.

Grandpa

Life is one fuckin' beauty contest after another.

Dwayne

[written on piece of paper showing it to Frank] Welcome to hell.

Dwayne

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Little Miss Sunshine Quotes

Listen to me. I got no reason to lie to you. Don't make the same mistakes I made when I was young. Fuck a lotta women, kid. Not just one woman, a lotta women.

Grandpa

Sheryl: He was snorting heroin.
Frank: You were snorting heroin?
Grandpa: [to Dwayne] Let me tell you, don't do that stuff. When you're young, you're crazy to do that shit.
Frank: Well what about you?
Grandpa: What about me? When you're old, you're crazy not to do it.