Christmas is a time for people with someone they love in their lives.

Billy Mack

When I was young and successful, I was greedy and foolish, and now I'm left with no one. Wrinkled and alone.

Billy Mack

Hiya kids. Here is an important message from your Uncle Bill. Don't buy drugs. Become a pop star, and they give you them for free.

Billy Mack

Tony: You'll come back a broken man.
Colin: Yeah, back broken from too much sex.

[Natalie, a secretary, is greeting the Prime Minister]
Natalie: Hello, David. I mean "sir". Shit, I can't believe I've just said that. Oh, and now I've gone and said "shit" - twice. I'm so sorry, sir.
Prime Minister: It's fine, it's fine. You could've said "fuck", and then we'd have been in real trouble.
Natalie: Thank you, sir. I did have an awful premonition that I was going to fuck up on the first day. Oh, piss-it!

Jamie: It's my favorite time of day, driving you.
Aurelia: [in Portuguese] It is the saddest part of my day, leaving you.

American girls would seriously dig me with my cute British accent.

Colin

[in Portguese] I will miss you. And your very slow typing... and your very bad driving.

Aurelia

I am Colin. God of Sex. I'm just on the wrong continent, that's all.

Colin

Grande, er... grande familio, grande tradizione de Christmas presents. Stupido.

Jamie

[on the phone to his sister] I'm very busy and important. How can I help you?

Prime Minister

Get a grip, people hate sissies. No-one's ever going to shag you if you cry all the time.

Karen

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Love Actually Quotes

Let's get pissed and watch porn

Billy Mack

Hurry up big boy, I'm naked and I want you at least twice before Jamie gets home.

Jamie's Girlfriend